Girlfriend
For a handful of heterosexual men, this term is referred to as one's laptop because they rarely want others touching it and it's the only warm thing that touches them below the waste for long periods of time.
Meek: Have you seen my girlfriend? Drake: Nikkis in Paris for a show. Meek: Nah I mean my MacBook Air. I wanna tweet a new diss at you. I probably won't see Nikki for awhile. Drake: It's next to Wayne's bed. Meek: I'm gonna curl up with my girlfriend and watch some Game of Thrones.
covfefelord over 8 years ago
Genius
Someone who works at an Apple Genius Bar to fix and teach you how to use your Macbooks and iPhones
Added by
zazpowered over 8 years agoWyle E. Coyote is a super genius.
Scalable
A term used by startups that aren't profitable, but say they are this to sound potentially profitable.
Investor: Is your startup profitable? What's the revenue since launch? Founder: We're not profitable, but we're scalable. We plan to scale up and then focus on revenue streams.
Original Jared over 8 years agoIFTTT
The mothership of all APIs. An app that lets you connect apps with other apps.
I used IFTTT to tweet when I get a weather notification.
Original Jared over 8 years ago@alphabet
A dad and self-proclaimed geek that lives in Cleveland, OH. Owns the @alphabet Twitter handle. Will soon become rich.
Guy 1: This guy's just a geeky dad on Twitter. Guy 2: No, he's @alphabet and will earn more money in one day than you've earned in an entire year.
Original Jared over 8 years agoHe's also a fan of the Cleveland Browns. Dads in Pittsburgh are geeks.
alphabet
The parent company of Google along with a handful of other companies. You can think of Alphabet as a mega company who owns a ton of shit.
My friends have been making fun of me ever since Google changed its name. Being an Alphabet employee sorta sounds embarrassing for some reason.
GoogleEngineer over 8 years agoAggregate
To list material from different websites over the Internet in one place.
There are hubdreds of news agregators on the Internet.
GoogleEngineer over 8 years agoCode Gay
When a developer is attracted to another developer's code. Made popular by Silicon Valley
Added by
zazpowered over 8 years agoPaaS
Platform as a Service. Provides a platform for developers to deploy and manage web applications without them having to worry about the underlying infrastructure.
Heroku is a popular PaaS
zazpowered over 8 years agoPaas could be the Easter egg coloring Platform as a Service.
it should be > Platform as a Service. Provides a platform for developers to deploy and manage web applications without them having to worry about the underlying infrastructure, but the platform.
MAU
Monthly active users. Number of unique users of an app during a month or 30 day period
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zazpowered over 8 years agoUber Funded
When your startup is funded from the side cash made off of Uber driving.
Zayne: Have you guys raised a round of funding? Pan: We are in fact, Uber funded. Zayne: Right...congrats?
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoLava Pressure
Intentionally making your life worse every time your startup doesn't pass a milestone.
Reynolds keeps putting lava pressure on his team by smashing a monitor everytime their company doesn't gain 10% more users in a given month.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoStartup Lifestylers
People who get into the startup scene just for the "rock star" lifestyle.
Jaime spends all his funding throwing parities and buying company swag. He's just a startup lifestyler.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoTupac Startup
An incredibly promising new company that unexpectedly dies at it's prime.
I heard the founders fucking hated each other. So even though their company was doing pretty well they became a tupac startup.
yungsnuggie over 8 years agohahaha
Milestone
Common term used to communicate between founders and investors the goals they intend on passing. Milestones are sometimes used in determination for future funding worth.
Draymond's company passed all it's milestones so the investors were happy to write him a check for the next round.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoSilicon Prarie
A coin termed in the late 90s to reference the tech booms impact on the telecom industry found in Chicago's Western Suburbs. This disappeared after the first tech bubble burst.
Recently this term has been repurposed to describe the new tech startup scene coupled with suburban tech companies moving to Chicago's downtown in the 2010's.
Rahm: California has Silicon Valley, here in Chicago we are building the Silicon Prairie.
Ismael over 8 years agoEscape Velocity
Speed at which meaningless buzzwords escape the lips of Pebble-wearing hipster entrepreneurs and Fitbit-wearing overweight VCs, when talking about rapidly growing start ups. Currently clocked at an average of 240 wpm.
VC: How do you plan to achieve your projected engagement numbers?
Entrepreneur: We plan to hack together a MVP by leveraging weekly Scrums and neutralize our burn r...
VC: I think you just achieved escape velocity.
That_Guy over 8 years agoCat Person Stereotype
The stereotype that engineers in Silicon Valley when given a choice would prefer ownership of a cat rather than a dog.
Ryan: I got you a cat for your birthday. Bob: Fuck you I like Corgis.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoZynga
A word used to describe the flashing and annoying ads which consume the lower 1/3 of your phone's screen.
Bro #1: Taking my phone to the shop, there's this weird Zynga on my screen that refuses to go away.
Bro #2: Ha, I had to throw mine in the trash to get rid of it.
That_Guy over 8 years ago
@blwinters lol
"the waste", a rather poetic typo