4

Business Hour

When you go to a happy hour with the only intention to network with people that might invest in you or promote your startup.

Rachel: That dude has been talking to Ryan Hoover this whole time. I know a Product Hunt feature is nice but I thought this was a happy hour not a business hour.

Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

    12

    IE Troll

    A person who purposely uses Internet Explorer in front of others and claims that it is the superior browser on the market, to either mock another person or make it seem like they are completely incompetent.

    Jack is an IE troll who gets girls to help him install chrome because he is "so bad" at using computers.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

      3

      Recruiter

      A non-technical sales person who acts as a professional middle man/woman that does everything they can to get between tech talent and the company they want to work for, in order to arbitrage the deal-flow around the economics of a code ninja actually working for a company. Their job is to get in the way and stop tech talent from working for the companies they want to work for unless they the recruiter can get paid for the work the tech talent does as well. They will only introduce you to the companies they can make money from and are not known to care about "fit" or your own happiness outside of them getting paid, but because they get paid so much for providing so little value they will smile and lie to your face and tell you otherwise.. Also known as a cancer to most startups and companies.

      Adam: The recruiter lied again. I'm still not getting paid on time or in the right amounts. And its not a full time gig like I was told, its a contract with no possibility of conversation or extension.
      Steve: Dude, that's what recruiters do. Never trust a recruiter, they are a cancer.

      Added by honestduane honestduane almost 9 years ago

        2

        Uber Fast Food

        When you are hungry during a Uber ride so you tell your driver to go through Mcdonald's drive-through.

        Matt: "Honestly, getting Uber Fast Food isn't so bad. It is a little awkward for the Mcdonald's employee to see your driver trying to align the backseat window with the drive-through window so you can pay . Of course if a friend sees you it's also a little embarrassing but that's it."

        Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

          16

          Slack

          A communication tool for sending messages, files, and GIFS to coworkers, team members, etc.

          Roberto: Hey Mike, did you get the TPS reports from Barbara?
          Mike: Nah hombre, let me go slack her.
          Roberto: Sounds good. Don't forget to spam the channel with GIFS that no want wants to see.
          Mike: Will do!

          Added by zander zander almost 9 years ago

            4

            Bro Rata

            A term used to describe your commitment to investing in your friendship every round even when it's going down to the right.
            A term coined by Startup L. Jackson.

            Tony: Friend, I'm going to be spending more time with you in order to maintain my bro rata in you. I just can't risk losing my stake anymore.
            Steven: Seriously, you're gonna do that after you went out with my girlfriend?!

            Added by svhunt svhunt almost 9 years ago

              2

              Dressing the part

              When an engineer that normally wears contact lenses puts on glasses for a job interview or pitch meeting.

              See http://svdictionary.com/words/software-engineer-uniform

              Jennifer: You seriously think wearing glasses is going to help you get funded?
              David: It's called dressing the part and it works so stop talking.

              Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                2

                Ephemeral Messaging

                Normally refers to modern chat services that delete the conversation users have between one another at some point in time.

                I love ephemeral messaging services because I never have to feel conscious about how much I curse.

                Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                  3

                  heads down

                  Focused intensely on developing, coding, building, making, and all around working hard.

                  I know all your engineers are heads down, but could you help me out with my landing page?

                  Added by nzieber nzieber almost 9 years ago

                    5

                    Hacker News Hack

                    A person who spends his time commenting on Hacker News product posts all day criticizing everything he sees, but is just barely aware that they can't make something original of his or her own.

                    During his breaks, Jack becomes a hacker news hack who browses hacker news all day and criticizes everything he reads.

                    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                      6

                      Adblock Competenacy Test

                      Checking to see if a person has enough basic knowledge to have installed adblock on their browser of choice.

                      After opening the link to the new Justin Bieber music video, George failed the Adblock Competency Test after waiting for a 30 second Honda commercial to end.

                      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                        4

                        *Insert Company Name Here* Happy Hour

                        We will give you free booze to browse our app, have a positive impression of us, and meet other people doing the same thing.

                        You should come to our Product Hunt Happy Hour early this Thursday. There's normally a line wrapping around the building.

                        Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                          6

                          Gluttonygramming

                          Programming and working at a slower pace to purposely get more food out of the company.

                          Jordan didn't feel like cooking dinner so he started gluttonygramming to force the company employee policy of paying a 15$ credit for engineer's dinner who works until after 7.

                          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                            13

                            Palo Alto

                            Spanish for "tall tree." English for "overly priced land."

                            The worst part about having to move to California and begin our new software company is living in Palo Alto. I'm working out of and living in a small house I have to split with 6 other guys and we're still paying a fortune!

                            Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                            • charlesjo charlesjo

                              There's a joke: Palo Alto is a 2 exit town. It takes 2 successful venture exits to afford to live there.

                              2
                              Reply
                              almost 9 years ago
                            5

                            Tech Drowning

                            How you feel after living in Silicon Valley for a while because it seems like everyone you talk to is either working at a startup, trying to start something or a VC. It's normal to feel a little annoyed when you overhear your bus driver say he is preparing a YC application (http://svdictionary.com/words/y-combinator).

                            Tim: Living in Silicon Valley is nice but its not hard to feel like you are tech drowning sometimes. The midwest would be a nice change

                            Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                              3

                              Button's Law

                              Inspired by Benjamin Button and Moore's Law, this is an observation that the average age of new engineers & entrepreneurs decreases by approximately 1 with every passing year. With online education becoming commonplace, people all over the world are able to learn at a faster pace. Critics of Button's Law argue that this doesn't make any sense because average age will eventually reach 0 but they are wrong.

                              Matthew: Damn did you read about that 7 year old entrepreneur? He started his own car company to compete with Tesla and has already raised funding.
                              Sarah: Jesus. Back when I was 7 I was building sand castles.

                              Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                                3

                                Synergy

                                A word used by members of the marketing department to describe a vague link to their company and the company that they are pitching to in order to receive a lucrative financial reward

                                "This kind of synergy between our 2 companies is what will fuel the future of forward thinking and bold innovation"

                                Added by thefacebook thefacebook almost 9 years ago

                                  3

                                  B.S. Computer Science, Freeloading Minor

                                  The distinction a CS student receives upon graduating college having written minimal code. This is done by free loading off of team members during group projects and copying code from peers during individual assignments. If they graduate having written no code, they get a double major.

                                  Brad: Did John write any code in his 4 years here? I just want to see if he got B.S. CS, Freloading Minor or B.S. CS, B.A. Freeloading

                                  Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                                    10

                                    Erlich Bachman

                                    A man of the hour. He sold his company Aviato. Now, he runs an incubator out of his house which also happens to be where Pied Piper is headquartered in. He invested in a few other ideas which never came to fruition. He played a critical role in coming up with an innovative and truly disruptive dick jerk algorithm.

                                    In season two, he helps Richard raise a seed round by going around negging a bunch of investors.

                                    There's no need for an example. He is the verb, noun and the everything else that matters in this world.

                                    Just watch this, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9_PfruyLlU enough said.

                                    Added by svhunt svhunt almost 9 years ago

                                      2

                                      Stack

                                      Shorthand for Stackoverflow, the question and answer site for professional and enthusiast programmers.

                                      A: "I just cannot figure out how I'm supposed to get this gulp task to work!"
                                      B: "Did you check Stack? Looks like a common enough problem."
                                      A: "Good point, I'll ask Stack."

                                      Added by picopallasi picopallasi almost 9 years ago