5

Logo Wingman

When an employee of a hot pre-IPO company purposely wears a lot of corporate swag to attract the opposite sex.

Richard: Yesterday I was talking to this woman at the bar and I purposely tilted my body so she could get a glance at the Uber logo on my sweatshirt. My backpack had Uber on it too. No response. I mean I didn't initiate conversation but I thought that would be enough.

Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 9 years ago

    17

    The LinkedIn Endorsement Burn

    Passive aggressively endorsing someone on LinkedIn for a menial skill such as Microsoft Word, while purposely ignoring their more relevant talents in things like Ruby on Rails or Objective C in an attempt to belittle them.

    Gilfoil got LinkedIn endorsement burned by Zeeshan when he purposely decided to only endorse him for Microsoft Powerpoint, even though he's a senior engineer at Pied Piper with a wide array of talents.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

      5

      Stack Overflow Effect

      Refers to how much Stack Overflow has improved developer efficiency around the world. If it didn't exist engineers would be using shitty mailing lists or figuring out things themselves.

      Boss: So you're telling me that because Stack Overflow is down you need to take a break? and I hired you because you know how to search a website that anybody in the world can access? Why am I paying you so much?

      Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 9 years ago

        4

        Linkedin Recommendation

        Something you write in response to a Linkedin recommendation you receive or if you want to receive a new Linkedin recommendation.

        Arrel: You know, I could just ask David for a Linkedin recommendation but I found the most efficient way is to just recommend them and wait for the kickback recommendation

        Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 9 years ago

          5

          Microsoft Word

          A skill people add to their Linkedin profile that instantly tells you, with 100% accuracy, that they are not tech savvy.

          Harold: I have Microsoft Word and Excel listed on my Linkedin profile with approximately 50 endorsements each and I'm not getting any responses to my tech job applications. Did I apply with the wrong email?

          Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 9 years ago

            7

            Tech Aficionado

            A person who is insecure about their superficial knowledge in software, hardware and technology in general, but really wants to fit in. It's a description often used in online social blogging bios.

            Hi my name is Homer, I'm a sushi enthusiast, cat owner, and a tech aficionado living in the Bay Area. I do marketing for Uber.

            Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

              6

              Silicon Beach

              The area around Playa Del Rey/Venice where a fuckload of tech companies are moving in. Synonymous with brogrammers and people that wear startup t-shirts in public.

              Brogrammer Intern 1: "These new start-up tanks are clutch! Silicon Beach is the fucking bomb dot com!"

              Brogrammer Intern 2: "Shakabrah dude let's get SugarFish later then hit up the Bungalow since we're rich and gentrifying LA!"

              Brogrammer Intern 1: "Tubular brah let me shave my neckbeard first then we can get hyphy for real my friend"

              Added by dicknose dicknose over 9 years ago

              6

              That's Startup Life

              The default response whenever someone talks about how shitty being an entrepreneur is.

              Kim: I've been working for the past 15 hours, can't afford anything but Taco Bell and investors are telling me they want to circle back in a few months. We all know what that means. This sucks.
              Matthew: That's startup life. What do you expect?

              Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 9 years ago

                9

                Ramen Profitable

                When a startup makes enough money to pay for the founders' living expenses. To read more check out Paul Graham's post on it

                Matthew: Just because it's called ramen profitable doesn't mean you need to be eating ramen all the time. There are other foods in the same price range.
                Kilim: Wait I don't?

                Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 9 years ago

                  6

                  Cloud

                  Also known as "The Internet".

                  Bill: "I'm currently working in Cloud-Based Employment Solutions Research."
                  Ted: "Are you looking for a job on Craigslist?"
                  Bill: "....yes."

                  Added by benjamin_james benjamin_james over 9 years ago

                    3

                    Churn Rate

                    Fancy term for the percentage of people that stop using startup's offerings.
                    Higher the churn rate, the more screwed up your startup will be.
                    Famously used in Andrew Chen's blog article on dating startups

                    Investor: So what's the churn rate for your company?
                    Founder: Well, in the last 3 months, about 80% of users came back to use our service.
                    Investor: So, about 20%. That's pretty good. But that's 80% out of how many?
                    Founder: ...

                    Added by svhunt svhunt over 9 years ago

                      21

                      Dave Ratio

                      It's very difficult to achieve gender parity at a startup, given the toxic culture. The next best metric, is to compare the number of men named dave, to the number of women. Reference

                      Alex: It's hard finding a company that has a reasonable number of women.
                      Kourtney: Have you tried working at a company with a 10:1 dave ratio?

                      Added by oakland_mike oakland_mike over 9 years ago

                        6

                        Jeremy Lin

                        The perfect child. A Harvard graduate and now a player in the NBA. He is often used in reference by parents (especially in Palo Alto where he went to High School) to "motivate" their child to do better in all aspects of life.

                        Krishna Lee: Mom, I got into UCLA!
                        Mom: "WHY YOU NO LIKE JEREMY LIN. HE GO TO HARVARD AND PLAY IN NBA."

                        Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                          5

                          The 90:10 Dilemma

                          When men or women question the workplace environment they're about to accept a position in solely based on the fact that there is an inordinately unbalanced ratio of men to women, which is highly perturbing to the individual.

                          After being sorrounded by men the entire day, Casey turned down the job at Zynga secretly perturbed by the 90:10 Dilemma.

                          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                            6

                            Silicone Valley

                            A nickname for Los Angeles, plastic surgery capital of the world. Commonly mistaken for Silicon Valley.

                            I'm going down to Silicone Valley this year for an Oscar Party.

                            Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                            18

                            DINK

                            Duel Income, No Kids - A co-worker who is married to another tech who makes as much as you do. They don't have any kids and spend their time buying things on Amazon Prime, paying for movies on Apple TV, drinking wine from an online wine delivery club, and drive their BMWs to spin class, yoga, and to drop their dogs off at doggie-daycare.

                            "Must be nice to have a partner that makes as much as you do. You DINKs have it all."

                            Added by RobotCowboy RobotCowboy over 9 years ago

                            • FuctCo5K FuctCo5K

                              Freeze yr eggs, bitch. I'm sure your career will improve so that you can feel OK to have kids.... someday. Hahaha sucker.

                              1
                              Reply
                              over 8 years ago
                            10

                            MD Daydreamer

                            A doctor who has passive regrets on his life choices and wonders on the inside whether he or she had what it took to start his or her own business. They makes it a priority to take the opportunity to pitch patients who work in software (regardless of what company they work for) in between his or her diagnosis and sometimes at dinner parties.

                            I stopped going to Dr. Jacobson who is an MD Daydreamer. He always pitches me his idea for canine heart monitors that sends out tweets once a day.

                            Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                              2

                              Linux Minters

                              Engineers whose preference in OS is the Linux Mint operating system. They are irrationally smart and work so fast that they are said to literally mint code like machines.

                              Jeremy is a Linux Minter who refused to use the Macbook Pro his office gave him, and instead uses his PC that has a vanilla version of Linux Mint installed.

                              Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                                5

                                Hovering Art Director

                                Anyone who stands over you and tells you to do something on your screen.
                                Originates from ad marketing but applies to design and development.

                                Ted: "Click on that and drag it to the left. Great, now move that down. More. More. Good."
                                Nancy: "Stop smudging my screen, you hovering art director!"

                                Added by RobotCowboy RobotCowboy over 9 years ago

                                  3

                                  Outside-In Engineer

                                  An engineer who doesn't display fear, anger, happiness, sadness or disgust, 5 key emotions popularized in Pixar's Inside Out.

                                  After being toured around Google X, Jack determined that most of the engineers seemed like outside-in engineers who didn't reveal a single emotion in his presence.

                                  Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago