Code Masochist
A person pursuing a CS degree from a university who finds everything way to easy for his own good, so to challenge himself (or herself) he or she purposely does the projects on the last day so they can feel a comparable amount of pressure to the other students who've sometimes had up to a month to finish. (Can also apply to software engineering employees who do their work irrationally close to the deadline).
Hai was such a code masochist that he decided to do his upper div cs projects 12 hours before it was due. The professor assigned it 4 weeks ago.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoFor Profit Do Good
A company that works to raise money for charitable causes, but is also a business that produces revenue. This is not incorporated as a Non-Profit organization.
charitybuzz.com
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoSimply Scheming
Trying to impress a future employer by referencing knowledge in Lisp (a programming language with a horrendous amount of parenthesis) that is mostly only taught at MIT and UC Berkeley. Simply Scheme is also the title to a textbook written by Brian Harvey (MIT alum and tenured Berkeley professor).
Fred simply schemed his way out of the first round interviews making his interviewer feel incompetent by his lack of knowledge in Lisp.
yungsnuggie over 9 years ago
Oski Eyes
When an engineering student (primarily UC Berkeley students) tries to talk to a girl but ends up frowning and giving her an awkward vibe because he is too scared to say anything. This is mostly done out of innocence and fear.
Cindy was really interested in meeting my friend Brian, but since she was the first girl he'd talked to in months he ended up giving her Oski eyes and scaring her off. She's over there talking to that Haashole Brad now.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoEngineer Hot Girl Syndrome
When a non-technical founder starts treating really good engineers like attractive girls, asking them out to dinner, buying them gifts arbitrarily, and sometimes getting nervous in their presence.
Zeeshan's friend Vishnu is such a good programmer I get engineer hot girl syndrome in his presence. I want him on our team so badly.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoTechnical Debt
Reason you give for not shipping shit
We have a bunch of technical debt we have to work resolve before we can ship X new feature
Flacko over 9 years agoPG
I want to say Paul Graham, but I also want to know whether you're totally clueless and out of the loop.
"I finally met pg in person.
SENPAI NOTICED ME."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoOn Demand
Another way of saying "for lazy people."
Meals on demand. That's right, we're revolutionizing the way you get pizza.
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoFederal
See http://svdictionary.com/words/enterprise, but way, way worse.
This word magically redirects investor attention elsewhere.
Founder: "Our ideal customer is the federal government."
VCs: "We are looking for more immediate ROI at this stage. It's been -really- nice talking to you."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoLiquidity Event
Founders start off owning the entire company.
Then they convince VCs to buy some of it, and they use that money to pay themselves salaries.
Then the VCs convince either retail investors or a megacorporation to buy the company, and that's a liquidity event.
This sounds like a pyramid scheme, but trust me, it isn't.
Employees can't do anything with their stock options until a liquidity event.
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoEnterprise
Adj. -- a synonym for "takes longer, but for way more money"
Sales: "The enterprise sales cycle takes months, but we're talking about whales here."
Manager: "All right, we've IPO'd now. It's time to adhere to enterprise process standards."
Engineer: "The enterprise module is going to be a huge effort, but if you're sure it'll be worth it..."
Sales & Engineering: "Does that mean we get raises?"
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoMVP
The "minimum viable product" is exactly like the product you had in mind, except with fewer features and more bugs.
Founder: "We're going to validate the market with our MVP."
Engineer: "Sweet!"
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoand not scalable
Noncompete Agreement
Any agreement by which:
- The employee pretends they won't go work for the competition.
- The employer pretends it's enforceable in the State of California.
Engineer #1: "They wanted me to sign a noncompete."
Engineers: "AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoCRUD App
An app that can create, read, update, and destroy information.
The proverbial hammer, and every single one of your brilliant startup ideas is a nail.
You are looking at a CRUD app right now.
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoNet 30
I hope this fly-by-night startup pays me before my rent check is due.
Founder: "And how fast do I need to pay you?"
Freelancer crosses fingers for luck.
Freelancer: "Oh, it's Net 30."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoDoors of a billionaire
Refers to a car belonging to a member of the three comma club with the doors that go up and down instead of side to side.
Russ: Do you wanna know what I have?!
Russ: A fu**ing car whose doors open like this.
Russ: Not like this like this!
svhunt over 9 years ago10x Engineer
A developer who incurs technical debt so fast he appears more productive than the ten developers tasked with cleaning his mess up.
Founder: "We are only looking for 10x Engineers."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoHackathon
A team of sweaty engineers in a cramped coworking space building a product that will never see the light of day. Business and marketing types can assist this effort by bringing caffeinated drinks. Brought to you by Amazon.
At the end, the most vaguely marketable product might get investor attention. If so, it will use AWS forever.
Engineer (excitedly): "I'm going to a hackathon this weekend!" Engineer (exhaustedly): "I went to a hackathon this weekend."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoStartup Dinner
4 contractors working evenings
$1800
Pizza for 4 full time engineers
$15
"Yes, you can -definitely- expense dinner."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years ago
This is taught heavily at Waterloo as well (although there is a fair bit of Haskell as well). Elegant weapons, for a more civilized world.