Companies Definitions

15

Buzzfeed

A site of hyperbole that occasionally masquerades as a news source when it wants to feel relevant.

TimeWaster: ”Did you see that article on Buzzfeed News?”
NormalPerson: “No..I was reading real news”

Added by svpro svpro over 8 years ago

    13

    Medium

    A web blogging platform where independent users write out their opinions that get featured in categorized groups called "Medium Collections."

    These articles don't adhere to any real journalistic standards, but are nice to read because in many instances they reaffirm your already deeply held beliefs.

    I just wrote 3 articles on Medium on how starting a startup is a really difficult but worthwhile journey. It got picked up and shared by 213 Twitter users.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

    9

    Y Combinator

    A label you add to your startup's intro (if chosen) that your company exchanges 7% of protected equity to arbitrary increase your valuation with.

    After getting accepted from Y Combinator, my 3 man team from [insert top 5 engineering school here], we launched our [insert undeveloped idea that sounds good on paper here], and raised 1.5 million dollars from Demo Day because we're changing the world.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

    • charlesjo charlesjo

      Possibly more valuable label than Stanford in the startup world.

      2
      Reply
      over 8 years ago
    7

    Product Hunt

    An app well known by tech people in Silicon Valley as a way to discover new startups and apps

    http://producthunt.com

    Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 8 years ago

    6

    Codecademy

    The default answer lazy software engineers give to their non-techinical friends, when asked what the best way to learn how to code is.

    Jimmy: You're such a good programmer. I want to learn how to code, but already have this Haas degree and can't go back to college. What can I do to learn today?

    Bobby: I don't know man, google it. I hear Codecademy is a thing. I just want to go back to playing DOTA.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

      6

      Tech Stars

      An incubator people apply to when getting rejected from YC. They aren't definitively worst it just always happens to be your second choice every time.

      I gotta move to Boston now that we got into Tech Stars and need a semi reputable incubator.

      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

        6

        Amazon

        A company that sells groceries to the lazy, stock shares to the gullible, and cloud services to the lazy and gullible.

        Amazon: because I want to buy my underwear and Redis clusters from the same company.

        Added by firasd firasd over 8 years ago

          6

          Snapchat

          A mobile app that lets you share intimate pictures with the people you just met at the bar instantly. It also lets you share temporary moments of your life that are not cool enough or sometimes too embarrassing to share on Facebook or Twitter.

          I just add everyone I meet on Snapchat and send them pictures of the cat I found on my street.

          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

            5

            Philz Coffee

            A coffee brand that Bay Area engineers and investors drink because Starbucks is too mainstream. They think their consuming premium beans, when really it's all based on multi-bean combinations that no one in their right mind can tell the difference between. Because they secretly know this they ask if you'd like cream and sugar (aka Philz Way)

            Zeeshan: Can I try your Ambarosia?
            Matt: Sure, let me try your Tesora.
            Zeeshan: Wow I taste a more buttery aftertaste in yours.
            Matt: Woah is that a hint of Blueberry.
            Justin: You guys are both full of shit. They taste exactly the same. This is Philz Coffee, not Blue Bottle.

            Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

              5

              Y Combinator

              Y Combinator is an early stage seed fund started by Paul Graham in 2005. The combined market cap of Y Combinator companies is currently over $30 billion

              John: You should apply for Y Combinator they will give you 120k for 7% of your company and provide great mentorship.
              Amit: Great idea. I'm going to apply

              Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 8 years ago

                5

                Microsoft

                The company Bill Gates and Paul Allen started while stealing undocumented IP from Apple and Xerox.

                Steve: You STOLE MY COMPUTER.
                Bill: You stole from Xerox. I stole from a thief.

                Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

                  4

                  Microsoft

                  A global corporation that depends for its existence on the inertia of Bob in accounting (see “Excel”.)

                  Our CIO mandated that the entire company use Google Drive instead of Microsoft Office. He is no longer our CIO.

                  Added by firasd firasd over 8 years ago

                    4

                    Grindr

                    A male to male friend finding app referenced in the first episode of Silicon Valley in which Erlich Bachman claims to have a 10% stake in.

                    Little more about me.
                    I am the founder of Aviato.
                    And I own a very small percentage of Grindr.
                    It's a men to men dating site where you can find other men within 10 miles of you.

                    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 8 years ago

                      4

                      Airbnb

                      A website for people to rent out lodging. An example of a dumb sounding idea that turned out really well.

                      VC: So let me get this straight. A stranger will come into your house and sleep on an air mattress? and then you will give them breakfast? and you think it will be worth $25 billion one day? I know the market is really hot for founders right now but you need to do something else.

                      Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 8 years ago

                        4

                        Y Combinator

                        A higher-order function that satisfies the "fixed point theorem"

                        Professor: "We have Y = [\f . (\x . f(xx) ) . (\x . f(xx)) ], that we call the Y-Combinator"
                        Business student: "SORRY PROFESSOR BUT YOU ARE WRONG. Y COMBINATOR IS AN INCUMBATOR OK???"
                        Professor: "Please calm down Michael, Paul Graham is indeed very inspired, and enthusiastic about lambda calculus but this..."
                        Business student: "NO HE IS THE FOUNDER OF Y-COMBINATOR, I HAVE PROOFS"
                        Professor: "Sigh."

                        Added by freefunctor freefunctor over 8 years ago

                          4

                          Medium

                          A blogging platform to announce your Incredible Journey.

                          http://svdictionary.com/words/incredible-journey

                          Added by employeeNumbaOne employeeNumbaOne almost 8 years ago

                            3

                            Microsoft

                            A company built around the fact that Bob from accounting exists.

                            Hacker 1: Are you going to Microsoft's big data hackathon?
                            Hacker 2: No, winning prizes are only for those who analyse csv dumps in Microsoft Excel.

                            Added by Mrandrewandrade Mrandrewandrade over 8 years ago

                              3

                              Apple

                              A massive electronics company started by Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak. With $180B in cash on hand, a $730B market cap and people all over the world scrambling to buy their latest products, Apple is doing almost everything well. A large part of their success is due to their marketing of the latest iPhone upgrade as the greatest thing in the world. See http://svdictionary.com/words/this-changes-everything

                              Jenny: I need that gold iPhone. I make $10k a year but I need that iPhone

                              Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 8 years ago

                                3

                                Yahoo

                                Company that unnecessarily places yahoo login in every one of their apps even though it results in bad onboarding experience.

                                Ryan: Dude, why do I have to create a yahoo account to test out livetext? This is stupid. Fuck yahoo.

                                Added by svhunt svhunt over 8 years ago