Original Jared (27)
Positive Cash Flow
Something your startup doesn't have. A term used to indicate that a company has more money coming in that going out.
Guy 1: Hey, does our startup have positive cash flow?
Guy 2: Not a chance.
Original Jared over 8 years agoD2F ratio
D2F ratio or "dick to floor" ratio is used to determine the relationship between two or more men and the distance between their penises and the floor. Often used to calculate the most efficient way to jerk off men at TechCrunch Disrupt events.
Guy 1: How do we jerk off 4 men at the same time and dick swap them to maximize jerking?
Guy 2: Well we'd have to figure out the D2F ratio and group men based on that.
Original Jared over 8 years agoA/B Testing
A method of experimentation to test which products, services, or marketing tactics return higher conversion rates, customer satisfaction, sales, etc. Used to weed out shitty products or services and prioritize one, better product or service.
Guy 1: Hey we have two email newsletters. Which one do you think would return a more sales?
Guy 2: Don't know, let's use some A/B testing and see which one performs better.
Original Jared over 8 years agoScalable
A term used by startups that aren't profitable, but say they are this to sound potentially profitable.
Investor: Is your startup profitable? What's the revenue since launch? Founder: We're not profitable, but we're scalable. We plan to scale up and then focus on revenue streams.
Original Jared over 8 years agoIFTTT
The mothership of all APIs. An app that lets you connect apps with other apps.
I used IFTTT to tweet when I get a weather notification.
Original Jared over 8 years ago@alphabet
A dad and self-proclaimed geek that lives in Cleveland, OH. Owns the @alphabet Twitter handle. Will soon become rich.
Guy 1: This guy's just a geeky dad on Twitter. Guy 2: No, he's @alphabet and will earn more money in one day than you've earned in an entire year.
Original Jared over 8 years ago
He's also a fan of the Cleveland Browns. Dads in Pittsburgh are geeks.