pygmyknight
pygmyknight (75)

6

On Demand

Another way of saying "for lazy people."

Meals on demand. That's right, we're revolutionizing the way you get pizza.

Added by employeeNumbaOne employeeNumbaOne almost 7 years ago

    26

    Engineer Hot Girl Syndrome

    When a non-technical founder starts treating really good engineers like attractive girls, asking them out to dinner, buying them gifts arbitrarily, and sometimes getting nervous in their presence.

    Zeeshan's friend Vishnu is such a good programmer I get engineer hot girl syndrome in his presence. I want him on our team so badly.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 7 years ago

      8

      Code Masochist

      A person pursuing a CS degree from a university who finds everything way to easy for his own good, so to challenge himself (or herself) he or she purposely does the projects on the last day so they can feel a comparable amount of pressure to the other students who've sometimes had up to a month to finish. (Can also apply to software engineering employees who do their work irrationally close to the deadline).

      Hai was such a code masochist that he decided to do his upper div cs projects 12 hours before it was due. The professor assigned it 4 weeks ago.

      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 7 years ago

        12

        Bootstrap

        Funding your startup from your own pocket money. (Because nobody will invest in it)

        I don't need VC money, I have decided to bootstrap it myself. Yeah!

        Added by mkagenius mkagenius almost 7 years ago

          5

          Asshole Gifting

          to present a recently purchased item of large value to others; best done while being Russ Hanneman.

          Dinesh: "So you wanted to show us that you weren't an asshole by showing us the car you just bought for yourself?"

          Added by whportman whportman almost 7 years ago

            10

            Lean Domaining

            Is a strategy used by scrappy startup founders to acquire domains from domain squatters for the lowest price possible. You email the squatter under the guise of a young boy trying to set up a website for his local church group. By using bad grammar (and just sounding dumb in general) you need to sell to the squatter how little money you have, how much hardship you are going through and how much that website will mean to your community. After selling you the domain, the squatter may read your $35m Series A on Techcrunch but that's just business.

            hey john,

            I'm new to the internet i sw that you own cars.com. my church group has made me in charge of setting up a web page. I heard that geocities would be a good place to start. u recommend perl? anyways i have $50. please help me out

            Timmy

            Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

              2

              Whale

              A term borrowed from the gambling world to refer to higher rollers that drop a lot of cash and make casinos a ton of money. In Silicon Valley, whale refers to high rollers in mobile games. Zynga, Supercell and other mobile gaming companies make most of their money from whales as less than 3% of freemium game players spend any money on in-app purchases.

              Richard: Lets make our game free so we can attract the most number of downloads and hope that a good percentage of our players convert into whales.

              Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                15

                Uber Driver Engineer

                A label that describes a lot of Uber drivers. When you talk to one they will tell you they are trying to learn how to code, build an app and start a company. Uber is only now, startup is future. The passenger will encourage the driver but deep down inside they don't think its happening.

                Because of the success of Uber there has been an influx of Uber Driver Engineers trying to start their own companies.

                Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                  7

                  This is Uber

                  What a passenger will say to turn down their Uber driver when he attempts to start a conversion or expects a fist bump. This happens because of the high percentage of Uber drivers that also drive for Lyft.

                  Driver: Man the weather is really nice today. Where are you headed?
                  Chris: This is Uber.

                  Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                    59

                    Non-technical Cofounder

                    A Wharton MBA who will overestimate the value of his idea and underestimate the value of the person who will implement it. Often wonders why his technical cofounders leave him and the apps they build look like shit and get hacked all the time.

                    Non-technical Cofounder: Why do all these technical cofounders leave me? Did they not see the MBA from Wharton in my email? I'm telling you right now, I know how to write a business plan. I even offered the last guy 10% of my company.

                    Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                    10

                    Erlich Bachman

                    A man of the hour. He sold his company Aviato. Now, he runs an incubator out of his house which also happens to be where Pied Piper is headquartered in. He invested in a few other ideas which never came to fruition. He played a critical role in coming up with an innovative and truly disruptive dick jerk algorithm.

                    In season two, he helps Richard raise a seed round by going around negging a bunch of investors.

                    There's no need for an example. He is the verb, noun and the everything else that matters in this world.

                    Just watch this, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9_PfruyLlU enough said.

                    Added by svhunt svhunt almost 7 years ago

                      6

                      TresCommas

                      This word's roots comes from the number 1,000,000,000. Which has 3 commas. TresCommas is a club that was formed by billionaires. The word is a hybrid of Spanish and English. "Tres" meaning three (3), and Commas meaning, well, commas ",". The only way to be inducted into the TresCommas Club is to have a net worth of at least 1 billion dollars. Correct usage of the word requires an inter-cap spelling, both the "T" and "C" should always be capitalized to further emphasize what it denotes. Should a club member's net worth fall below TresCommas, membership status is instantly revoked. Members are easy to spot in SV because the cars they drive have Billionaire Doors. TresCommas is also a brand of Tequila, which is only available to members of the TresCommas club.

                      I'm in the TresCommas club and have the Tequila to prove it.

                      Added by trescommas trescommas almost 7 years ago

                        7

                        Post Silicon Valley Move Stress Disorder (PSVMSD)

                        What an investment banker experiences after moving to Silicon Valley because he is no longer at the top of the totem pole.

                        Lloyd: The other day I was talking to this girl when suddenly this nerdy Facebook employee starts talking to her, not even Mark, just a regular employee... and then she completely ignores me. I work in finance. I repeat, I work in finance. I miss New York.

                        Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                          13

                          Palo Alto

                          Spanish for "tall tree." English for "overly priced land."

                          The worst part about having to move to California and begin our new software company is living in Palo Alto. I'm working out of and living in a small house I have to split with 6 other guys and we're still paying a fortune!

                          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 7 years ago

                          • charlesjo charlesjo

                            There's a joke: Palo Alto is a 2 exit town. It takes 2 successful venture exits to afford to live there.

                            2
                            Reply
                            almost 7 years ago
                          4

                          Ping

                          Send as a message via some messenger.

                          Ping me that bug.

                          Added by mkagenius mkagenius almost 7 years ago

                            16

                            Slack

                            A communication tool for sending messages, files, and GIFS to coworkers, team members, etc.

                            Roberto: Hey Mike, did you get the TPS reports from Barbara?
                            Mike: Nah hombre, let me go slack her.
                            Roberto: Sounds good. Don't forget to spam the channel with GIFS that no want wants to see.
                            Mike: Will do!

                            Added by zander zander almost 7 years ago

                              3

                              Apple

                              A massive electronics company started by Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak. With $180B in cash on hand, a $730B market cap and people all over the world scrambling to buy their latest products, Apple is doing almost everything well. A large part of their success is due to their marketing of the latest iPhone upgrade as the greatest thing in the world. See http://svdictionary.com/words/this-changes-everything

                              Jenny: I need that gold iPhone. I make $10k a year but I need that iPhone

                              Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                                4

                                Airbnb

                                A website for people to rent out lodging. An example of a dumb sounding idea that turned out really well.

                                VC: So let me get this straight. A stranger will come into your house and sleep on an air mattress? and then you will give them breakfast? and you think it will be worth $25 billion one day? I know the market is really hot for founders right now but you need to do something else.

                                Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                                  19

                                  Making the world a better place

                                  Solving a very specific problem that loosely translates into a social benefit.

                                  We are making the world a better place through P2P iBeacon messaging platforms.

                                  Added by dennis dennis almost 7 years ago

                                  • charlesjo charlesjo

                                    Look at how much time sink we've created for evil people... with Reddit.

                                    1
                                    Reply
                                    almost 7 years ago
                                  3

                                  Chris Bosh

                                  An NBA basketball player that promoted computer science in a code.org video. Some people are skeptical that a 6'10 power forward making 20m a year is coding in his free time but its possible.

                                  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5oHe0ozN7Oc

                                  Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago