pygmyknight
pygmyknight (77)

4

Smart Smart

The state of being so smart that you're smart is smarted to the smartest degree! In other words, it's when you've been able to hook your brain to the internet in a desperate attempt to make you smarter.

Just think of it like this: Internet of Things + Your Brain = Smart Smart

Person A - man what a world, we've got smart phones, smart TVs, smart watches, smart frying pans, smart dildos, smart this, smart that, what's next?
Person B - the Smart Smart!
Person A - what the hell's that?
Person B - it's best for me to give you a demo.
Person A - Um, how are you gonna do that?
"Person B approaches Person A and in Matrix fashion, hooks a cable to the back of his neck and watches Person A squirm until he's dead... uh I mean connected to the internet"

Added by tosfan4ever tosfan4ever almost 9 years ago

    4

    The Self-Importance Check In

    Checking into a notable location on social media platforms without providing any context of why you're there. This is mostly done to increase intrigue about oneself and make others more interested in your life.

    Matt: I haven't talked to Erlich Bachman in 2 years, but I saw on Facebook that he just checked into SV Angel. He must be up to something big.
    Zeeshan: Nah it was just a self-importance check in to get his followers excited. We walked past the building and just had lunch at the Crepevine across the street. We then played LoL for 3 hours.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

      5

      Tech Lobbyist

      A person whose job it is to lobby for big tech corporations like Google, Facebook, Apple, etc. Their work increasingly involves pushing congress and local government to enact laws that they barely understand anyway dealing with topics like cyber security, dragnet surveillance, and online constitutional issues.

      After finishing school at Berkeley, Jim became a tech lobbyist for Facebook approving laws with technical jargon that most congressmen aren't familiar with anyway.

      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

      • blog blog

        With the FTC breathing down its neck, Google has stepped up its lobbying spend in the last year, shelling out $4.03 million in 2009. That's up 44% from the year prior. Despite the growth, Google's lobbying spend remains relatively small. Microsoft spent $6.7 million in 2009. Comcast spent $12.6 and AT&T spent $14.7 million. We decided to take a look at lobbying from tech companies after we ran a chart looking at ad spending for tech companies. (For what it's worth, Google's lobbying is half what it spends on advertising.) Our lobbying data comes from the Senate Office of Public Affairs database. We also graphed lobbying spend as a percent of revenue. Interestingly, of the companies we looked at, ebay spends the least on lobbying as percent of revenue. Guess that's the advantage of not dominating any market, other than mp3 players

        1
        Reply
        over 8 years ago
      • blog blog

        sorry ..... correction ( in above comment istead of apple it was mistyped as ebay)

        1
        Reply
        over 8 years ago
      5

      Korean

      Ethnic subgroup common in Silicon Valley.

      In the workplace they tend to be more nepotistic, viewing other Korean engineers more favorably. They are also split by generational divides; Korean born engineers and American Born Korean Engineers interact rarely.

      Among Korean born engineers imported from abroad, hierarchical attitudes can be common. Emphasis is placed on age, company ranking and salary.

      "The Koreans are going out again."

      "Why don't they ever invite us along?"

      "Don't worry about it man, they're always up to some secret Korean shit."

      Added by koreanfuckboy koreanfuckboy almost 9 years ago

        5

        The Macbook Selfie

        A selfie one takes on his or her own macbook normally out of laziness or vanity.

        I was sorta attracted to Mark, but after adding him on Facebook and seeing his Macbook selfie profile picture in a dimly lit disgustingly messy room, I'm sorta of repulsed by him.

        Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

          12

          To Pao

          To have to step down from a companies executive board at the complaint of the product's core user base.

          James got paod out of his company after continually getting in controversial flame wars with the companies customer base.

          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

          4

          RSS

          Stands for Rich Site Summary. Often called Really Simple Syndication, it uses a family of standard web feed formats to publish frequently updated information: blog entries, news headlines, audio, video.

          Paul Graham describes Twitter in 3 words: RSS with trolls.

          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

            5

            Pre-Revenue

            The purist form of startup. A startup that is valued for billions of dollars without recording any sales revenue. Typically, less revenue demonstrates a higher valuation by "Early Stage Investors"

            Investor: 'What's your revenue model?'
            Founder: 'At the moment, we are pre-revenue...we are focused on user acquisition and securing a unicorn valuation for our Series A'

            Added by healpay healpay almost 9 years ago

              4

              Rule 74

              In a every 10 engineers, one of them has contributed to the archives of Rule 34.

              Julius: Did you know that in his free time, Deron draws suggestive pictures of the characters of My Little Pony and uploads them to Deviant Art?
              Jack: He's the ninth engineer in our startup. Rule 74 man.

              Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago

                5

                Hardware Engineer

                A generally hardworking engineer who works on designing and building physical products after years of dedication to a certain field.

                Mistakes they make are very costly since they can't recompile or release a hotfix

                Software engineer: I always wanted to do hardware but I heard it is tough

                Hardware engineer: If it was easy it would be called easyware!

                Added by Mrandrewandrade Mrandrewandrade almost 9 years ago

                  8

                  Pre-IPO Bubble

                  A currently "non-occuring" speculative bubble where there is an increasing number of pre-ipo companies with ridiculous valuations which will never reach investor expectations

                  Economist: it seems like the dot com bubble is happening again except companies are pre IPO

                  VC: woah, this start up has expential user growth must be the next unicorn! Better invest now.

                  Added by JonWilkins JonWilkins almost 9 years ago

                    3

                    Private Beta

                    When a startup requires an invite to use their product but invite codes are handed out like candy. Used to appear favorably to investors because it implies there were at least some users that wanted to use their product but couldn't get in.

                    Founder: Guys we are in private beta right now but if you use invite code TRYME you will have access. Don't share with your friends though. Make sure you don't share

                    Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                      4

                      Apportunity

                      When a mobile app has the capability to improve or perform a commonly desired action.

                      This is a great apportunity- a way to use our smart phones to decrease lines at the DMV by allowing reservations.

                      Added by Robert Urban Robert Urban almost 9 years ago

                        4

                        Jack Dorsey Style Scale

                        A highly scientific way to rate Internet moguls' approach to dressing relative to that of Jack Dorsey's. Reference

                        Sarah: Woah Mark Pincus dresses really well. I think he is an example of an internet mogul with 5 out of 5 on the Dorsey Style Scale.
                        Adarsh: That's true but he's not an engineer. We need to revise the scale to be technical moguls only if want to make it fair.

                        Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                          4

                          Nelson “Big Head” Bighetti

                          Nelson "Big Head" Bighetti was a tenant of Erlich's incubator and is Richard's friend. He is hired by Hooli on a huge promotion to work on Nucleus, Hooli's version of Pied Pier, and to spite Richard. After Big Head is removed from the Nucleus project due to his limited tech knowledge he begins to rest and vest. Later he is promoted to Sole Head Dreamer at Hooli XYZ, a bullshit title and department, because Gavin wants to sue Pied Piper by arguing that Big Head came up with Pied Piper's algorithm while at Hooli.

                          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bPAiAE7COo
                          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFhrjtZBV_k
                          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vwo5rjlLhTo
                          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fM67VYO8qeo

                          Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                            7

                            -preneur

                            The suffix you add/integrate with any noun to make it sound instantly cooler!

                            Please see - intrapreneur, wantrepreneur, recesspreneur, solopreneur, mompreneur, dadpreneur, infopreneur and...

                            This - http://www.forbes.com/sites/kevinkruse/2015/06/22/employee-engagement-strategy/

                            Person A - Man my life sucks
                            Person B - Why?
                            Person A - Because I'm broke, unemployed, lost my wife, kids hate me, and worst of all! Everyone thinks I'm a total loser on Twitter, they're calling me #loserAndy
                            Person B - Aw shucks my friend, that totally sucks... how about we turn that frown upside down shall we? Instead of calling yourself a loser Andy, start calling yourself a loserpreneur! At least you've got nothing to lose! #loserpreneur

                            Added by tosfan4ever tosfan4ever almost 9 years ago

                              5

                              Google Dance

                              When a website is constantly shifting organic ranking placements within the Google search engine result pages.

                              CEO- Our website is doing the "Google Dance" this month.
                              Marketing Manager-Yes, we've been "Google Dancing" like its 1999!

                              Added by DavidZ DavidZ almost 9 years ago

                                6

                                Venture Dunce

                                A "VC" outside of the Bay Area that has little to no experience in software/hardware, enterprise, and consumer plays. Often seen funding the nth food delivery market place or Uber meets bicycles. The dumb money that keeps many startups fed.

                                Just raised $10mm from the Venture Dunce for my Uber meets Chinese food delivery. Hope he doesn't visit the Bay Area much.

                                Added by 15years 15years almost 9 years ago

                                  4

                                  Startup 15

                                  Similar to Freshman 15 except this weight gain is caused by alcohol and catered meals that your startup offers you.

                                  John: My startup needs to stop feeding me. I already have Startup 15 but luckily there's a gym at work.

                                  Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 9 years ago

                                    6

                                    The Zuckerberg Like

                                    When a Facebook employee reaches a major life milestone and Mark Zuckerberg has acknowledged their existence by liking their Facebook profile picture. This normally happens after their team pushes a major feature onto the Facebook web or mobile client..

                                    I've been working at Facebook as a Product Manager for 3 years and I've finally gotten the Zuckerberg like. I nearly fainted. I'm going to work here until I'm dead.

                                    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 9 years ago