Managerial Reach-Around
This is when a startup manager/CEO/founder sits over your shoulder, watching you code/design and providing unhelpful input. In the most extreme cases, they are physically touching your keyboard, mouse, and/or screen.
I've been trying to get work done all day, but the CEO is such a shitty manager that he keeps giving me a managerial reach-around. Why can't someone teach him to delegate?!
jpdavy over 9 years agoJust go start a company
Common advice given in Silicon Valley due to the current rockstar status of entrepreneurs and how easy and affordable it has become to start a company. Tools like AWS, Heroku and Rails have made it easy for new developers to put up simple websites and mobile apps to validate their ideas. Online coding education such as Codecademy is getting better and becoming more commonplace. With all that said, not everyone is suited to be entrepreneur, companies need employees and being a successful entrepreneur is not as easy as it may seem based on the number of funding announcements you see on TechCrunch.
http://techcrunch.com/2014/07/20/the-problem-with-founders/
Boss: I think you have too much potential to be working here as an early employee. Just go start a company.
David: I don't really want to. The last idea I attempted was an on-demand cat walking service and it failed so badly I don't want to ever do it again.
Boss: I'll be honest. That sounds pretty bad... but I still think you should start a company.
zazpowered over 9 years agoValue Add
Noun. A term for vague and banal advice VCs like giving the founders, supposedly helping uncover the secrets to building a successful business.
VC (at board meeting): you know, it is very important not to run out of money
Founder (trying to placate -- more funding will be needed soon): that's a very good point, we are on it
VC: when we invested, I told you we bring a lot of "value add," not just money
Founder: (placating again): gee, you were right, and we appreciate it
VC (smug, and actually beliving they just helped): thank you
sheynkman over 9 years agoNecessity is the Mother of Invention
A outlook describing how a founder's untapped creative wealth comes to life when put in perilous (and sometimes self-inflicted) situations.
Jim: I've spent all my investment money on t-shirts and shot glasses. How am I going to raise another round and pay my engineer's salary.
Lewis: Relax, they say necessity is the mother of invention. Let's take more shots out of these glasses you bought.
Jim: In the time it took you to finish that sentence, I found a new renewable energy source.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoOffice Kitchen Thief
1st Definition: Somebody who takes food or drink from their startup's kitchen with the intention to consume it at home versus at the workplace. Not a real thief.
2nd Definition: Somebody who takes food or drink labeled with one of their coworkers' names.
Bob: My Instacart delivery isn't going to come in time. I'm going to be a office kitchen thief for today and just grab a few things
zazpowered over 9 years agoGrad School Scapegoat Purgatory
The situation in which one purposely enrolling into grad school with the intention of delaying the inevitable fate of getting a job or starting a company.
Lewis: I enjoyed my time at UCLA so much that I decided to go to grad school?
Jack: Do you plan on going into resarch?
Lewis: Well no. I just want to chill and be in grad school scapegoat purgatory for awhile.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoHipster Designer Fallacy
The mistaken belief that good designers must be hipsters or look like hipsters.
Tim: So there's this really great designer I am interviewing. He has a really nice portfolio and seems like a sharp dude but he doesn't have oversized black rimmed glasses or a scarf. Do you think he will be any good?
Rachel: Hmm. I wouldn't risk it.
zazpowered over 9 years agoThe Self-Importance Check In
Checking into a notable location on social media platforms without providing any context of why you're there. This is mostly done to increase intrigue about oneself and make others more interested in your life.
Matt: I haven't talked to Erlich Bachman in 2 years, but I saw on Facebook that he just checked into SV Angel. He must be up to something big.
Zeeshan: Nah it was just a self-importance check in to get his followers excited. We walked past the building and just had lunch at the Crepevine across the street. We then played LoL for 3 hours.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoTimid Sales Rep
The Timid Sales Rep is completely honest about the SAAS product he is selling, not pushy and never raising his voice. He also misses quota most of the time.
Sales Rep: How did I do on that call?
Sales manager: Why the hell were you speaking so softly? Also I know the base package only allows 10 users but you need to kludge it a little. Just tell them 15 to close the deal.
zazpowered over 9 years agoSoylent Diet
Refers to the diet of busy entrepreneurs in Silicon Valley. Instead of eating like normal human beings these entrepreneurs drink Soylent, a powered meal replacement, because it is more efficient than chewing and using knife and fork.
Check out this New York Times article for more about this interesting phenomenon.
Matthew: Wow have you heard of Soylent? It will allow me to work throughout the day without wasting any time to eat like these foodies out here. I only wish it came in a backpack so I could attach a feeding tube between it and my stomach and have it on the go.
zazpowered over 9 years agoOne Dollar Billionaire
Refers to the $1 a year salary that a lot of founders and top executives take on for tax benefits. It's also because who really cares about salary when you have a billion dollars.
Mark Zuckerberg: I make $1 a year. You know what that means
zazpowered over 9 years agoSoylent Profitable
A term that can be used interchangeably with ramen profitable.
Basically means the same thing as ramen profitable except founders of the startup are drinking soylent.
With the increase in popularity, its rich nutrition and affordability, more and more health-concerned entrepreneurs are changing their diet to soylent.
"Soylent profitable is the new Ramen profitable." - Kim-Mai Cutler https://twitter.com/kimmaicutler/status/603918465536262144
svhunt over 9 years agoNelson “Big Head” Bighetti
Nelson "Big Head" Bighetti was a tenant of Erlich's incubator and is Richard's friend. He is hired by Hooli on a huge promotion to work on Nucleus, Hooli's version of Pied Pier, and to spite Richard. After Big Head is removed from the Nucleus project due to his limited tech knowledge he begins to rest and vest. Later he is promoted to Sole Head Dreamer at Hooli XYZ, a bullshit title and department, because Gavin wants to sue Pied Piper by arguing that Big Head came up with Pied Piper's algorithm while at Hooli.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bPAiAE7COo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFhrjtZBV_k
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vwo5rjlLhTo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fM67VYO8qeo
zazpowered over 9 years agoBackseat Investor
An investor who will never tell you no, but will wait for a lead investor to commit so he can take a backseat and ride the return train. They always tell you to keep them informed with your project without ever providing active help.
I thought Cody would be a generous investor after his company got acquired, but instead he's just another backseat investor waiting for a bigger fish to bite.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoGood-Cheap-Fast
The inevitable desire of any contractor. The typical rip-off method which any serious author should refuse.
Could you make it with all features till evening after we agree on the price?
Francis over 9 years agoJack Dorsey Style Scale
A highly scientific way to rate Internet moguls' approach to dressing relative to that of Jack Dorsey's. Reference
Sarah: Woah Mark Pincus dresses really well. I think he is an example of an internet mogul with 5 out of 5 on the Dorsey Style Scale.
Adarsh: That's true but he's not an engineer. We need to revise the scale to be technical moguls only if want to make it fair.
zazpowered over 9 years ago*Insert Noun Here* Enthusiast
A description often used in online social blogging bios that superficially attempts to showcase aspects of one's personality that one wants others to remember them for. Many times these descriptions are used to compensate for lack of knowledge or experience in that very same area.
Hi my name is Homer, I'm a Ruby on Rails enthusiast, cat owner, and a tech aficionado living in the Bay Area. I do marketing for Lyft.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoMechatronics
Waterloo's most difficult and arguably best engineering discipline. Noted by its difficult admission process, large number of top tech emloyees/startup founders and highest suicide rate (per student enrolled) in Canada
Person A: what did they guys behind the MYO at thalmic labs study? Person B: They were the fortunate few that actually made it through Mechatronics at Waterloo without killing themselves Person A: isn't that the same as they guys behind bufferbox and kik messenger? Person B: Yeah, they are probably all laughing at their classmates at Google, Facebook and Apple who took offers over starting their own company.
JonWilkins over 9 years agoPre-IPO Bubble
A currently "non-occuring" speculative bubble where there is an increasing number of pre-ipo companies with ridiculous valuations which will never reach investor expectations
Economist: it seems like the dot com bubble is happening again except companies are pre IPO VC: woah, this start up has expential user growth must be the next unicorn! Better invest now.
JonWilkins over 9 years agoPost-LinkedIn Instacrushing
Being attracted to someone only after seeing their LinkedIn.
Jake: Did you know that Julia is employed at Square and got a 2300 SAT score when she was in High School? I'm in love with her.
George: Shut up Jake. You're so shallow, your just Post-LinkedIn Instacrushing on her.
yungsnuggie over 9 years ago