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46

This changes everything

Nothing has changed. Pure marketing

See http://svdictionary.com/words/changing-the-world

Introducing the iPhone 4. This changes everything.

Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 7 years ago

  • charlesjo charlesjo

    Love it. Although, I did love my iPhone 4S. And it still runs like ALL Apple products I have ever owned!

    2
    Reply
    over 7 years ago
  • thepaleking thepaleking

    Doesn't change much to be honest, 99% marketing 1% decent phone

    2
    Reply
    about 7 years ago
54

Fuck you money

When you make enough money from a startup or job that you can basically do whatever you want. Usually from equity after a liquidity event.

Engineering manager: Congrats on the IPO everybody. See you guys on Monday.
Engineer: I'm not sure about that
Manager: You think you can do whatever you want now you have that fuck you money?
Engineer: Sorry sir. I just got a little excited

Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 7 years ago

35

Brogrammer

When you mix your typical engineer with your typical frat boy. The official heuristic to identify a brogrammer in your organization is when you can't tell whether the suspect is part of your engineering team or your sales team.

David: I originally thought Kilim was a programmer but he's been popping his collar and talking a lot. Is he a brogrammer?

Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 7 years ago

  • bkelly bkelly

    More useful information for problogrammer here IBM

    1
    Reply
    over 6 years ago
27

10x Engineer

A concept sometimes used in Silicon Valley to describe an engineer that is 10x more productive than an average engineer although the 10x metric is figurative. Sometimes referred to as "Ninjas", these engineers are highly sought after by all tech companies.

Jim: You gave me 100 resumes but none of these guys are 10x engineers. Why hire a few of these guys to slow us down when a 10x engineer is so much more productive?

Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 7 years ago

26

Crushing it

Achieving exceptional success with something.

Jess is totally crushing it with her new Uber-for-VC-funding app. She's already been hunted.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcS-zlgj4ak

Added by Travis Travis over 7 years ago

  • charlesjo charlesjo

    Founders use this term until "Awesome Journey."

    2
    Reply
    over 7 years ago
30

Stack

Refers to the variety of technologies used to build and maintain your website, app, or service. Might also refer to a large amount of pancakes.

Son: Hey pops, wanna throw another stack on my plate? Pass the syrup too.
Pops: No son, your stack needs to maintainable, don't let your code base get out of control!

Added by zander zander over 7 years ago

    56

    Engineer Unicorn

    An engineer that is competent, good looking, dresses well and is not socially awkward.

    John: How come no other engineers are like David?
    Mary: He's an engineer unicorn. They are rare.

    Added by pygmyknight pygmyknight over 7 years ago

    • torbenberger torbenberger

      The legend says some of them can be found here http://www.engineerunicorns.com

      2
      Reply
      over 7 years ago
    • employeeNumbaOne employeeNumbaOne

      "Unicorn" is a common term for an engineer (usually front-end) who also has good taste in design and is able to contribute to UX early on. But "unicorn" is also used for startups that turn out to be breakout successes, like Uber and Airbnb. Silicon Valley really likes unicorns.

      3
      Reply
      over 7 years ago
    37

    Uber of...

    Commonly used by startup founders to compare their mediocre startup or idea to the startup unicorn Uber.

    Startup Founder: We're the Uber of food delivery.
    VC: Uhhh... so is everyone else.

    Added by ssc242 ssc242 over 7 years ago

    • iceariel13 iceariel13

      Yep, seamless, delivery,com, munchery, caviar...the list never ends

      1
      Reply
      over 7 years ago
    • N.Hemingway N.Hemingway

      You should additionally add "Facebook of..." probably the most heard phrase since 2010 ;D

      1
      Reply
      over 7 years ago
    32

    Gamification

    Adding game elements to normally not game related software or processes in order to increase engagement.

    A: User testing has shown that users don't like our accounting app.
    B: We should really be adding some gamification.
    A: Will that make the app more useful?
    B: No, but more fun!

    Added by graup graup over 7 years ago

      33

      Awesome Journey

      Used when a startup has failed. Intend to give a positive spin on what is a gut wrenching moment.

      While our startup has failed, it has been an awesome journey.

      Added by beenpoor beenpoor over 7 years ago

      33

      Code Ninja

      A euphemism that is used by Bay Area recruiters who don't actually know what in specific they want in a Software Engineer, just someone who can pretty much do everything and anything that's handed to them.

      We're looking to recruit the best Code Ninjas possible for our startup of 4 currently employed non-technical founders. Free pizza will be provided on Wednesdays.

      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 7 years ago

      • charlesjo charlesjo

        Also used oddly and inappropriately by non-Asians as term of endearment to their Asian-American friends.

        1
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      93

      Waterloo

      A mythical University in Canada where many good Engineers and Computer Scientists come from.

      Sam: "Where are all these Canadians from?"
      Matthew: "We hired 10 interns and 20 full-times from Waterloo. They get shit done because if we don't hire them, they'll have to work for Blackberry."

      Added by robert robert over 7 years ago

      • zazpowered zazpowered

        @orien No what are you talking about

        1
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • zazpowered zazpowered

        @SingleCommaClub It's similar to what you see from immigrants to a new country like US or Canada

        1
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • zazpowered zazpowered

        I have a lot of friends from canada and waterloo and this seems really accurate from what i've heard

        1
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • charlesjo charlesjo

        It's like a parallel universe of Silicon Valley where people speak American English...

        3
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • orien orien

        @zazpowered aren't you from waterloo

        2
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • freefunctor freefunctor

        @SingleCommaClub That's not true at all. Pretty much everyone I know from my graduating class got offers from US companies. A significant proportion of students choose to stay because the region is booming right now, and also the quality of life in Canada is pretty high.

        2
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • zazpowered zazpowered

        @freefunctor toronto and canada are awesome

        2
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • SingleCommaClub SingleCommaClub

        Have worked with a lot of engineers from Waterloo through internships and full time. Can honestly say they are very talented, but there is a bias because all the ones that make it to US companies are generally top notch.

        2
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • Devilinlimbo Devilinlimbo

        I love this site!

        6
        Reply
        almost 6 years ago
      52

      Early Employee

      A founder who will take 1% of the company instead of 25%. This is a polite way of saying "sucker."

      CEO: "We couldn't have done it without a few great early employees."

      Added by employeeNumbaOne employeeNumbaOne over 7 years ago

      • SingleCommaClub SingleCommaClub

        I still wouldn't minded having been an early employee at Facebook or Uber.

        4
        Reply
        over 7 years ago
      • employeeNumbaOne employeeNumbaOne

        @silconobserver Zach Holman.

        1
        Reply
        over 6 years ago
      • silconobserver silconobserver

        This is total and utter bullshit. The founder risks his entire savings, family/friend relationships and pours his life into his startup. When things finally begin to work he goes out and hires the first few employees. In return the "early employees" get paid market rate or slightly below market rate and get equity and the founder gets painted as a greedy bastard? Who is the real sucker here

        3
        Reply
        over 6 years ago
      26

      Engineer Hot Girl Syndrome

      When a non-technical founder starts treating really good engineers like attractive girls, asking them out to dinner, buying them gifts arbitrarily, and sometimes getting nervous in their presence.

      Zeeshan's friend Vishnu is such a good programmer I get engineer hot girl syndrome in his presence. I want him on our team so badly.

      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 7 years ago

        59

        Non-technical Cofounder

        A Wharton MBA who will overestimate the value of his idea and underestimate the value of the person who will implement it. Often wonders why his technical cofounders leave him and the apps they build look like shit and get hacked all the time.

        Non-technical Cofounder: Why do all these technical cofounders leave me? Did they not see the MBA from Wharton in my email? I'm telling you right now, I know how to write a business plan. I even offered the last guy 10% of my company.

        Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 7 years ago

        36

        MBA

        Certification that you've read case studies on how others have succeeded.

        Steve: Have you started your business yet?
        Jeremey: No I'm getting my MBA. I'll start my first business when I'm 30 and have a wife and kids.

        Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 7 years ago

        40

        Bus Factor

        The number of people that need to be hit by a bus before their project is dead.

        "Our engineers work in teams of 10 for the higher bus factor"

        Added by asdf asdf over 7 years ago

        • employeeNumbaOne employeeNumbaOne

          It is well known that engineers make a "SPOF" sound when hit by a bus.

          2
          Reply
          over 6 years ago
        30

        Vanity Metrics

        Useless data that looks good but does not necessarily correlate real success.

        Bob: Our website gets a million views daily!
        Mark: How many of them are you converting to paid users?
        Bob: Well.. we are still working on that.

        Added by serge serge over 7 years ago

        8

        X for Y

        A way entrepreneurs use to describe their startup to customers and investors so they can quickly grasp how their product works. It is done by comparing your startup to another successful company that likely pioneered its business model.

        My startup is Airbnb for cars = people can borrow your car when you are not using it
        My startup is Uber for food = food will be delivered to you on demand
        My startup is Urban Dictionary for Silicon Valley = svdictionary.com

        Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 7 years ago

          7

          Man Jose

          Man Jose refers to the city of San Jose, located within Silicon Valley, which contains a large number of male Software Engineers.

          Sam: Why can't I find a nice girl to go out with?
          Mark: What did you expect? You live in Man Jose.

          Added by xmangoslushie xmangoslushie over 7 years ago