iamDeveloper (58)
Early Employee
A founder who will take 1% of the company instead of 25%. This is a polite way of saying "sucker."
CEO: "We couldn't have done it without a few great early employees."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoFuck you money
When you make enough money from a startup or job that you can basically do whatever you want. Usually from equity after a liquidity event.
Engineering manager: Congrats on the IPO everybody. See you guys on Monday.
Engineer: I'm not sure about that
Manager: You think you can do whatever you want now you have that fuck you money?
Engineer: Sorry sir. I just got a little excited
zazpowered over 9 years agoIn the single comma club now... :/
@SingleCommaClub that's not bad. you will get to two commas soon
Awesome Journey
Used when a startup has failed. Intend to give a positive spin on what is a gut wrenching moment.
While our startup has failed, it has been an awesome journey.
beenpoor over 9 years agoAka a Medium post.
Also known as an "Incredible Journey", as in http://ourincrediblejourney.tumblr.com/
Non-technical Cofounder
A Wharton MBA who will overestimate the value of his idea and underestimate the value of the person who will implement it. Often wonders why his technical cofounders leave him and the apps they build look like shit and get hacked all the time.
Non-technical Cofounder: Why do all these technical cofounders leave me? Did they not see the MBA from Wharton in my email? I'm telling you right now, I know how to write a business plan. I even offered the last guy 10% of my company.
zazpowered over 9 years agoWorked with a guy just like this before. We had tons of competition doing the exact same thing but dude refused to change his ideas or strategy at all. Happy it was contract work.
Also known as "Ideas Guy"
As opposed to a technical cofounder that shaves yaks because they have no clue about business?
Popular phrase: "Looking for a technical co-founder"
Thiel Fellow
A student under the age of 20 handpicked by Peter Thiel to drop out of college and start a company.
I dropped out of MIT because Peter Thiel just gave me a $100,000 to realize my dream of creating a social network for dogs.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoSan Francisco
The city of San Francisco is one the most famous cities in the Bay Area, home to the SF Giants, hipsters, a thriving LGBT community, and enough fog to make you consider suicide, commonly referred to as "The City". When non Bay Area natives talk about the Bay Area, they're either talking about SF or Silicon Valley.
Alex: Yo man, you doing something later? It's Friday.
Kim: Yea I'm thinking about heading to The City later for some drinks, probably near Nob Hill or something.
Alex: Sounds chill. Can I come?
Kim: I don't know if it's your scene. The place has pretty hipster bars. They all have PBR on tap for $5 a pint.
xmangoslushie over 9 years agoThis changes everything
Nothing has changed. Pure marketing
See http://svdictionary.com/words/changing-the-world
Introducing the iPhone 4. This changes everything.
zazpowered over 9 years agoLove it. Although, I did love my iPhone 4S. And it still runs like ALL Apple products I have ever owned!
Doesn't change much to be honest, 99% marketing 1% decent phone
College Dropout
A complete wildcard. They are either genius level smart or are biting off more they can chew. In the case of the latter, they have either watched too many Peter Thiel talks that didn't apply to them, watched The Social Network more than 2 times, or are not familiar with the terms on this website.
Like I used to go to Davis, but now I'm a college dropout. It's just that school was holding me back you know? Like Zuck in the Social Network, I'm just way smarter than everyone and girls don't get me. I got my iPod on Kanye West's College Dropout album too cuz that's what I relate too and he's pretty much singing about me.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoBuzzfeed Writer
A mediocre writer, but decent list builder. Their article titles usually follow the model: [Number] [Subject] So [Hyperbole] You [Claim]
10 Clickbaity Titles So Enticing You Have To Click
svpro over 9 years agoLOL
WOW
#7 will blow your mind.
Code Ninja
A euphemism that is used by Bay Area recruiters who don't actually know what in specific they want in a Software Engineer, just someone who can pretty much do everything and anything that's handed to them.
We're looking to recruit the best Code Ninjas possible for our startup of 4 currently employed non-technical founders. Free pizza will be provided on Wednesdays.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoAlso used oddly and inappropriately by non-Asians as term of endearment to their Asian-American friends.
Bus Factor
The number of people that need to be hit by a bus before their project is dead.
"Our engineers work in teams of 10 for the higher bus factor"
asdf over 9 years agoIt is well known that engineers make a "SPOF" sound when hit by a bus.
Silicon Valley Billionaire
Silicon Valley Billionaires tend to be younger, poorer dressed and generally less douchey than billionaires from other areas. Some are so poorly dressed that it is often hard to distinguish one from a hobo. In New York, a 23 year old scrawny male with t-shirt and jeans might be told to fuck off at a Lambourhini dealership but the same thing would never happen in Silicon Valley.
Sales person: Do you think I should even talk to that guy over there. It doesn't look like he can afford a car.
2nd sales person: That's Mark Zuckerberg
zazpowered over 9 years agoUber of...
Commonly used by startup founders to compare their mediocre startup or idea to the startup unicorn Uber.
Startup Founder: We're the Uber of food delivery.
VC: Uhhh... so is everyone else.
ssc242 over 9 years agoYep, seamless, delivery,com, munchery, caviar...the list never ends
You should additionally add "Facebook of..." probably the most heard phrase since 2010 ;D
Engineer Unicorn
An engineer that is competent, good looking, dresses well and is not socially awkward.
John: How come no other engineers are like David?
Mary: He's an engineer unicorn. They are rare.
pygmyknight over 9 years agoThe legend says some of them can be found here http://www.engineerunicorns.com
"Unicorn" is a common term for an engineer (usually front-end) who also has good taste in design and is able to contribute to UX early on. But "unicorn" is also used for startups that turn out to be breakout successes, like Uber and Airbnb. Silicon Valley really likes unicorns.
Brogrammer
When you mix your typical engineer with your typical frat boy. The official heuristic to identify a brogrammer in your organization is when you can't tell whether the suspect is part of your engineering team or your sales team.
David: I originally thought Kilim was a programmer but he's been popping his collar and talking a lot. Is he a brogrammer?
zazpowered over 9 years ago
I still wouldn't minded having been an early employee at Facebook or Uber.
@silconobserver Zach Holman.
This is total and utter bullshit. The founder risks his entire savings, family/friend relationships and pours his life into his startup. When things finally begin to work he goes out and hires the first few employees. In return the "early employees" get paid market rate or slightly below market rate and get equity and the founder gets painted as a greedy bastard? Who is the real sucker here