svhunt (108)
Free OS Neutrality
The stance that you honestly just don't give a fuck about which Operating System is better. Just that it comes on a computer you don't have to pay for as an employee computer.
I was a Linux and Windows advocate all my life until Google gave me Macbook Retina. Now I abide by Free OS Neutrality.
GoogleEngineer over 9 years agoalphabet
The parent company of Google along with a handful of other companies. You can think of Alphabet as a mega company who owns a ton of shit.
My friends have been making fun of me ever since Google changed its name. Being an Alphabet employee sorta sounds embarrassing for some reason.
GoogleEngineer over 9 years agoTo Get Eduardofucked
Getting your equity diluted, while thinking that no one in the company hates you enough to fuck you over. This happened to a Facebook founder, Eduordo Saverin, by Mark Zuckerberg and Sean Parker. Goes under Zuckerberging and pretty much why he sued the fuck out of Facebook and Mark later on.
Let's Eduardofuck a bunch of Stanford MBAs who can do marketing and who don't know how cap tables work. We can promise them dilutable common stock and save a ton of money.
HalfLife3 over 9 years agoAccelerator
A term given to startup incubators that promise new startups connections, advice, and office space in exchange for percentage ownership of a company.
Ron: We're already getting 150,000 users a day Wes: Why do people even use accelerators anyway? They're glorified cheerleaders.
GoogleEngineer over 9 years agoA publicly-traded spam-bot and click-bait machine. It will steal your contacts info and transmit spam to you and your contacts in perpetuity. The 'Unsubscribe' link in the email is only a placeholder. LinkedIn engineers deliberately did not code any action into the link click, because Fuck You!
Compelled by the torrent of spam, you will login to the web interface/app and have your news feed bombarded with Grade A click-bait from famous internet trolls such as Business Insider.
I recently signed up on LinkedIn and now my 100GB inbox is #reckt.
That_Guy over 9 years ago
Uber Funded
When your startup is funded from the side cash made off of Uber driving.
Zayne: Have you guys raised a round of funding? Pan: We are in fact, Uber funded. Zayne: Right...congrats?
HalfLife3 over 9 years agoEscape Velocity
Speed at which meaningless buzzwords escape the lips of Pebble-wearing hipster entrepreneurs and Fitbit-wearing overweight VCs, when talking about rapidly growing start ups. Currently clocked at an average of 240 wpm.
VC: How do you plan to achieve your projected engagement numbers?
Entrepreneur: We plan to hack together a MVP by leveraging weekly Scrums and neutralize our burn r...
VC: I think you just achieved escape velocity.
That_Guy over 9 years agoTweetstorm
When somebody wants to tweet something that is more than 140 characters but is not considerate enough to link to a blog post or use an image. Tweets in a tweetstorm are generally numbered and look like a mini essay in your Twitter feed.
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zazpowered over 9 years agoGrowth Hacking
Growth hacking is a buzzword journalists and marketers shamelessly use to describe marketing techniques that uses internet applications in non-traditional ways. It makes the person saying it seem as if they've mastered a skill traditional marketers haven't caught on to. Although this is incredibly important aspect for startups it is pretty much a douchier way of saying marketing.
Studying various growth hacking techniques, Jimmy decided to email a million people Dogecoins with his companies name at the bottom of the email to increase exposure.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoJanitor at startup
The title an asshole CEO (generally a sole founder) puts on their Linkedin title to show they have the ability to fire anybody.
Random dude: Where do you work?
Albert: I am at the greatest game company around called BigVikingGames
Random dude: Cool, what do you do there?
Albert: I am the janitor, I just take out the trash!
Random dude: cool story bro
timferris over 9 years agoFacebook Reach
Facebook reach is the number of people that see posts from Facebook pages. Organic Facebook reach has dropped since Facebook made changes to their feed algorithm to encourage companies to buy ads promoting page posts.
It's almost pointless for our startup to promote our Facebook page because we will have to pay to get any Facebook reach.
zazpowered over 9 years agoMoney Book
Slack Hit-and-Run
When a coworker joins your team's slack channel, posts a link, and leaves before anyone can say anything.
joe 4:30pm
joe 4:30pm
joe 4:30pm
jerry 4:30pm
toby 4:30pm
jerry 4:30pm
joined #channel
http://funnylink.com/risky-click
left #channel
quality hit and run
huh.
semi-not-appropriate-for-work tho
jzboch over 9 years agoValley Optimistic
Refers to the optimism that people in Silicon Valley have for new technology and ideas that people outside of the area might be skeptical of.
"You know I'm valley optimistic but I really don't think that tic-tac-toe mobile game you pitched me is going to do all that well"
zazpowered over 9 years agoAuthority branding
Authority branding enables a person or a company to be perceived as the go-to expert in their industry.
Also called authority positioning.
Ida Giroday is an international authority branding consultant and success coach for women entrepreneurs. She helps her clients become the leader in their field and fast-track their success.
Zaza G almost 9 years agoZynga
A word used to describe the flashing and annoying ads which consume the lower 1/3 of your phone's screen.
Bro #1: Taking my phone to the shop, there's this weird Zynga on my screen that refuses to go away.
Bro #2: Ha, I had to throw mine in the trash to get rid of it.
That_Guy over 9 years agoCode Crushing
Naming the variables in your code after the person you have a crush on.
Diane: Let me take a look, maybe I can help you debug. Ryan: Wait NO! Diane: Why is my name everywhere in your codebase. Ryan: I've been code crushing ever since you joined the company last week. I'm just too much of a coward to tell you my feelings. Diane: That's pretty obvious. I found you bug though. You left out a parenthesis.
HalfLife3 over 9 years agoWonder how you thought of this......
A/B Testing
A/B testing is when you test two variants of something A and B to determine which one maximizes the outcome you want. It is commonly used in web design.
After doing some A/B testing, Buzzfeed determined that the headline "You'll never believe what happened next" had a 50% higher click through rate than the headline "The cat ran across the lawn" so that's what they used.
zazpowered over 9 years agoThe Five Dollar Footlong Lean Startup Diet
When a startup founder lives off of five dollar foot long sandwiches to save money for his or her early stage venture. They buy a single five dollar foot long subway sandwich, eat half of it in the afternoon and the other half at dinner.
Since Julius is on the five dollar day long diet, he only eats footlong subway sandwiches everyday to conserve his companies startup money. It's kind of sad.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoHow do you come up with this stuff?
Overtime Dinner Tradeoff
Normally if an employee stays until 7pm (two extra hours after they are free to go) the office gives them a 15 dollar credit toward dinner. Many employees don't mind staying an extra two hours at their mostly well-funded office to not have to shell out cash for dinner every night. The office wins with two hours of extra labor and the employee wins with not having to worry about dinner.
Many companies use systems like Waiter.com to diversify food choices as well, so everyday the employee gets 15$ of food from a new restaurant.
Jim: I saved a total of 500$ this month on food. Lee: God...the overtime dinner tradeoff is the one of the only things making me consider joining a big company. I'm sick of eating 5 dollar footlongs every day.
HalfLife3 over 9 years agoSee also: "Startup Dinner"
CTR
CTR which stands for click through rate is the ratio between clicks and impressions. It is a commonly used term in online advertising and email campaigns as a way to measure effectiveness.
Dan placed a small banner ad on his website that received 5 clicks in 100 page views for a CTR of 5%. After making the banner ad full screen his CTR increased to 100% but nobody returned to the site.
zazpowered over 9 years agoI've had this problem with mobile apps. I spam ads, but nobody comes back.
@SingleCommaClub where do you think i got it from
Best thing I've read on SVD.