RobotCowboy
RobotCowboy (38)

7

Phone Sleep

Refers to the one hour in bed you will spend checking your phone before you actually go to sleep.

SAT question: If Johnny is a phone sleeper and needs to real sleep by 12am so he can wake up for a 7am interview what time does he need to get to bed?

Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

    7

    Disruptive

    An adjective to describe a start-up or technology that thrashes resources in the economy, because causing people to lose their means of income and scotching the value of resources is super fun and awesome.

    This disruptive vegetable/fruit-picking technology will help migrant laborers lose their jobs so they can go back to their homeland and get decapitated by drug cartels.

    Added by FuctCo5K FuctCo5K almost 7 years ago

      8

      Eat Your Own Dog Food

      Actually using the product that you make.

      To realize the users' pain points with your product, you have to eat your own dog food and actually use it.

      Added by trescomas trescomas almost 7 years ago

        6

        Duck Syndrome

        The duck syndrome is where on the surface of things, someone seems normal and are floating along peacefully. However, the truth is that underneath the water the person is paddling feverishly to keep going.

        People: Oh dude! Everything in the startup world seems fun!
        You: Oh yeah man! I love it, it's super easy. *cries deeply inside*

        Added by Spshulem Spshulem almost 7 years ago

          9

          Equity Whore

          A startup founder that micro manages company equity to maximize his own ownership but loses sight of more important things.

          David: Did you hear? I managed to negotiate that lead engineer down to 0.3%. Now I will have an extra 1%.
          Sarah: Stop being such an equity whore, having a smaller piece of something is better than having a large piece of nothing.

          Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

            6

            Freemium

            A strategy used by startups to make money by shoving as many people through the top of a funnel as possible and hoping some of them convert into paid users.

            Matthew: Right now we have a shitty product that nobody will pay for. Lets release it for free so at least somebody will use it and then we can gradually improve it and charge them for extra services.

            Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

              21

              Innovator

              A catch-all euphemism for "douchebag." Frequently used to a) describe one's self in a Twitter bio/LinkedIn headline or b) describe others when you're not really sure what they do exactly, but it probably has something to do with disruption or artisanal donuts or growth hacking or some shit.

              Your LinkedIn headline: "Innovator/CEO of Douche, The World's First Ephemeral Craft Beer Wearable."

              Added by supernovanGirl supernovanGirl almost 7 years ago

                5

                Airbnb Job

                Refers to the job of renting out sections of your own apartment or even renting and purchasing new property for the sole purpose of renting out on Airbnb.

                Rachel: You told me you didn't have a job.
                Tim: Oh, it's an Airbnb job. Not a real job but my closet is fetching $800 a month right now so I make good money.

                Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                  10

                  Who's Hiring

                  A once-a-month opportunity for startups and tech companies get their grimy hands on the website HackerNews and post their job listings. Qualifications often include being a code ninja (http://svdictionary.com/words/code-ninja) or a 10x engineer (http://svdictionary.com/words/10x-engineer) for little pay and long hours because you get equity, yo.

                  HackerNews: 'Who's hiring?'
                  Every startup: 'we are and we're the best bc of culture and stuff, yo.'

                  Added by zander zander almost 7 years ago

                    2

                    Linux Minters

                    Engineers whose preference in OS is the Linux Mint operating system. They are irrationally smart and work so fast that they are said to literally mint code like machines.

                    Jeremy is a Linux Minter who refused to use the Macbook Pro his office gave him, and instead uses his PC that has a vanilla version of Linux Mint installed.

                    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 7 years ago

                      10

                      MD Daydreamer

                      A doctor who has passive regrets on his life choices and wonders on the inside whether he or she had what it took to start his or her own business. They makes it a priority to take the opportunity to pitch patients who work in software (regardless of what company they work for) in between his or her diagnosis and sometimes at dinner parties.

                      I stopped going to Dr. Jacobson who is an MD Daydreamer. He always pitches me his idea for canine heart monitors that sends out tweets once a day.

                      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie almost 7 years ago

                        8

                        X for Y

                        A way entrepreneurs use to describe their startup to customers and investors so they can quickly grasp how their product works. It is done by comparing your startup to another successful company that likely pioneered its business model.

                        My startup is Airbnb for cars = people can borrow your car when you are not using it
                        My startup is Uber for food = food will be delivered to you on demand
                        My startup is Urban Dictionary for Silicon Valley = svdictionary.com

                        Added by zazpowered zazpowered almost 7 years ago

                          3

                          Dark Pattern

                          A Dark Pattern is a user interface that has been carefully crafted to trick users into doing things, such as buying insurance with their purchase or signing up for recurring bills.

                          http://darkpatterns.org/

                          Added by zazpowered zazpowered over 6 years ago