zazpowered
zazpowered (901)

4

The Control Alt Delete Solution

The go to action one conducts when they have no idea how to fix something. The control-alt-delete combination is a Windows command that summons a Task Manager to help shut down any program that's bugging out.

Added by GoogleEngineer GoogleEngineer over 9 years ago

    4

    Prorata Rights

    Prorata investment rights give investors the right to invest in a startup’s future fund-raising rounds and maintain their ownership percentage in the company as the company grows and raises more capital.

    Erlich kept his Prorata Investment Rights in Grindr allowing him to keep his 10% share as more investors started also investing their money on the application.

    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

      5

      Delaware C-Corp

      The widely accepted incorporation structure in Silicon Valley. It allows the most flexibility for entrepreneurs and investors putting their money in newer tech driven companies.

      Aref was so disgusted by our Florida LLC incorporation that he decided to pull his money out of our company based on sheer incompetence. I was able to win him over by telling him that Facebook once made the same mistake.

      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

        4

        Failing Up

        When obviously incompetent, uninspired, or undeserving employees are promoted, even when they openly fail for all to see. Inexplicably, this often occurs at the exact same time others around them are busting their ass to deliver for the company.

        Just relax - the dumber you are, the better you'll do.

        Person A: "How did Matt get that promotion? The guy hasn't written a line of meaningful code in over 6 months, all he does is write IRC robots that display cheesy GIFs when people are chatting about the size, shape, or length of something."

        Person B: "I know, he's failing up - I only wish I had it in me to be so carefree and incompetent."

        Added by csuwildcat csuwildcat over 9 years ago

          5

          Bug

          A bug is a flaw in software that causes an unintended result. Most bugs arise from errors in written code, rather than from a computer itself. Due to the prevalence of engineer-created bugs, some programmers sardonically refer to their bugs as "surprise features".

          Albert: Is there a bug in your code? I can't log into my account.
          Justin: That's a feature. The site is telling you to go outside and take walk.

          Added by xmangoslushie xmangoslushie over 9 years ago

            3

            The Auto-Touch Reflex

            The propensity for anyone born after 2000 to touch the screen of any electronic device (thinking it's like an IPad or IPhone)

            I gave my nephew the IPod 1 and it took him 10 minutes to figure out how to move through the songs and navigate it. He had the auto-touch reflex where he kept touching the screen to pick the song, until later he found out the wheel on the bottom was the only way.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lvlbRQq1UM

            Added by GoogleEngineer GoogleEngineer over 9 years ago

            9

            San Francisco

            The city of San Francisco is one the most famous cities in the Bay Area, home to the SF Giants, hipsters, a thriving LGBT community, and enough fog to make you consider suicide, commonly referred to as "The City". When non Bay Area natives talk about the Bay Area, they're either talking about SF or Silicon Valley.

            Alex: Yo man, you doing something later? It's Friday.
            Kim: Yea I'm thinking about heading to The City later for some drinks, probably near Nob Hill or something.
            Alex: Sounds chill. Can I come?
            Kim: I don't know if it's your scene. The place has pretty hipster bars. They all have PBR on tap for $5 a pint.

            Added by xmangoslushie xmangoslushie over 9 years ago

              6

              4 Year Vesting

              You get a percentage of a total amount of stock allocation that cashes in yearly intervals until your 4th year.

              Also another way of saying "I know it's tempting to leave, but we want you to stay while you're still young."

              Zeeshan: You should start your own company. You're smart enough and have know enough people to recruit a strong founding team.
              Kunal: Definitely! We should! I just need to wait until I'm 30 and my shares at Pied Piper vest!
              Zeeshan: That's how they get you.

              Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                3

                Voting Ring

                A voting ring is when you get people you know to upvote things for you on popular websites that use upvotes such as Hacker News and Reddit rather than waiting for organic upvotes. This is done to game the ranking algorithms of these websites and make your content appear at the top so others are able to see it.

                Wow. I got shadow banned from Reddit when I got caught in a voting ring as a result of asking everyone I know on Facebook to upvote my post.

                Added by svhunt svhunt over 9 years ago

                  4

                  Shadow Ban

                  A term used to refer to an account on Reddit where anything associated with the account is not visible to other users but to the owner of the account nothing has changed. When the account is shadow-banned, no other users can see your posts or even your profile.

                  I've posted a ton of links but I am not getting any upvotes or comments. Have I been shadow banned for breaking Reddit's rules?

                  Added by svhunt svhunt over 9 years ago

                    3

                    Github Flexing

                    Sharing your Github profile in as many places as possible with the intention of showing off all the work you've done on various projects.

                    Mark: Fuck Ryan is such a God. He showed me his github last night and now I'm sure we won't be able to beat him in the Hackathon.

                    Vanessa: Nah don't worry, he's just Github flexing

                    Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                      3

                      Intrapreneur

                      A product manager within a company who promotes innovative product development and marketing. He or she tends to question whether they could do everything they are doing now independent of the company they are working for, but are often too afraid to work on anything outside the confines of the company.

                      Jared was a leading intrapaneur at Hooli for 10 years building designing innovative features that made the company millions of dollars. He was always happy with his safe salary and never tried to do anything on his own.

                      Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                        7

                        Man Jose

                        Man Jose refers to the city of San Jose, located within Silicon Valley, which contains a large number of male Software Engineers.

                        Sam: Why can't I find a nice girl to go out with?
                        Mark: What did you expect? You live in Man Jose.

                        Added by xmangoslushie xmangoslushie over 9 years ago

                          5

                          Hackafreeloader

                          Someone who goes to Hackathons for the sole purpose of eating awesome food and getting free stuff.

                          Although he is an excellent programmer, James did not build anything at the Facebook Hackathon, but instead spent his time being a hackafreeloader eating catered food and drinking bottled juice. It was like a mini-vacation for him.

                          Added by yungsnuggie yungsnuggie over 9 years ago

                            3

                            Getting Swallowed By A Whale

                            When a bigger company builds what a startup was trying to release. The startup is normally in over it's ahead if the feature is very similar due to the companies resources, money, and development team advantage.

                            Ron: I heard Jack's startup was trying to annotate the internet.

                            Julia: They got swallowed by a whale. Genius.com got funded and did it before they could.

                            Added by HalfLife3 HalfLife3 over 9 years ago

                              9

                              Protective Incompetence

                              Being bad at something you don't like to do, so you don't have to do it.

                              > I think the reason I made such a mystery of business was that I was disgusted by the idea of doing it. I wanted to work in the pure, intellectual world of software, not deal with customers' mundane problems. People who don't want to get dragged into some kind of work often develop a protective incompetence at it. Paul Erdos was particularly good at this. By seeming unable even to cut a grapefruit in half (let alone go to the store and buy one), he forced other people to do such things for him, leaving all his time free for math. Erdos was an extreme case, but most husbands use the same trick to some degree.

                              http://www.paulgraham.com/start.html

                              Added by adamzerner adamzerner over 9 years ago

                                6

                                Title Promotion

                                A title promotion is a like a normal promotion, except without any increase in compensation, whether salary or otherwise. This is typically used to make engineers feel more important and get them to do more work without actually paying them for it.

                                Calvin: I just got promoted to Senior Software Engineer! I get to manage a team and maintain existing code!
                                Jerry: Are you getting paid more?
                                Calvin: No, but think of how exciting this opportunity is!
                                Jerry: ...

                                Added by xmangoslushie xmangoslushie over 9 years ago

                                  4

                                  Email Bankruptcy

                                  When an inbox has thousands of unread emails, and the best solution is to just mass-delete rather than spending days combing through them.
                                  If you really tried to read and respond to all of those messages, it might be a very long time before you interacted with another human IRL again.

                                  "My inbox is so overwhelming, I'm declaring email bankruptcy. I'm deleting everything sent before September!"

                                  Added by iamDeveloper iamDeveloper over 9 years ago

                                    10

                                    Mechatronics

                                    Waterloo's most difficult and arguably best engineering discipline. Noted by its difficult admission process, large number of top tech emloyees/startup founders and highest suicide rate (per student enrolled) in Canada

                                    Person A: what did they guys behind the MYO at thalmic labs study?

                                    Person B: They were the fortunate few that actually made it through Mechatronics at Waterloo without killing themselves

                                    Person A: isn't that the same as they guys behind bufferbox and kik messenger?

                                    Person B: Yeah, they are probably all laughing at their classmates at Google, Facebook and Apple who took offers over starting their own company.

                                    Added by JonWilkins JonWilkins over 9 years ago

                                      3

                                      Code Base Amnesia

                                      The process of exploring a code base one has architected more than a year ago, wondering why it was built the way it was and marveling at it's incredible structure. They often think to themselves how brilliant they were when constructing it so long ago.

                                      I had code base amnesia for pretty much every Compilers project I did as a Junior. That shit was so hard, I was such a genius to have gotten it all to work at the time.

                                      http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/35g0ib

                                      Added by GoogleEngineer GoogleEngineer over 9 years ago

                                      • svhunt svhunt

                                        hahaha happens to me everytime.

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                                        over 9 years ago