zazpowered (901)
Snapchat
A mobile app that lets you share intimate pictures with the people you just met at the bar instantly. It also lets you share temporary moments of your life that are not cool enough or sometimes too embarrassing to share on Facebook or Twitter.
I just add everyone I meet on Snapchat and send them pictures of the cat I found on my street.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoMicrosoft
The company Bill Gates and Paul Allen started while stealing undocumented IP from Apple and Xerox.
Steve: You STOLE MY COMPUTER.
Bill: You stole from Xerox. I stole from a thief.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoSocial Media
The first team to be downsized when you run out of funding.
Our social media manager was let go after she accidentally posted that Reddit thread to Twitter.
firasd over 9 years agoWaterloo
A mythical University in Canada where many good Engineers and Computer Scientists come from.
Sam: "Where are all these Canadians from?"
Matthew: "We hired 10 interns and 20 full-times from Waterloo. They get shit done because if we don't hire them, they'll have to work for Blackberry."
robert over 9 years ago@SingleCommaClub It's similar to what you see from immigrants to a new country like US or Canada
I have a lot of friends from canada and waterloo and this seems really accurate from what i've heard
It's like a parallel universe of Silicon Valley where people speak American English...
@zazpowered aren't you from waterloo
@SingleCommaClub That's not true at all. Pretty much everyone I know from my graduating class got offers from US companies. A significant proportion of students choose to stay because the region is booming right now, and also the quality of life in Canada is pretty high.
@freefunctor toronto and canada are awesome
Have worked with a lot of engineers from Waterloo through internships and full time. Can honestly say they are very talented, but there is a bias because all the ones that make it to US companies are generally top notch.
I love this site!
Stealth Mode
A startup that is a phase of secrecy in which they don't reveal what they actually do in an attempt to ward off potential competition.
Zeeshan What do you do?
Steve: I'm in a startup.
Zeeshan: What do you guys do?
Steve: I can't tell you. We're in stealth mode.
Zeeshan: That's dumb.
yungsnuggie over 9 years agoTinder Binge
When a person spends immense amount of time swiping right, in an attempt to get any match available regardless of attraction.
Ever since I've broken up with Mary, I've been on a Tinder binge trying to find someone...anyone.
yungsnuggie over 9 years ago
Early Employee
A founder who will take 1% of the company instead of 25%. This is a polite way of saying "sucker."
CEO: "We couldn't have done it without a few great early employees."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoI still wouldn't minded having been an early employee at Facebook or Uber.
@silconobserver Zach Holman.
This is total and utter bullshit. The founder risks his entire savings, family/friend relationships and pours his life into his startup. When things finally begin to work he goes out and hires the first few employees. In return the "early employees" get paid market rate or slightly below market rate and get equity and the founder gets painted as a greedy bastard? Who is the real sucker here
Cache of Innovation
A hyper localized and typically rural subset of engineers who choose to live places other than silicon valley and are exploited by politicians as examples of economic development.
Andy: Montana has a cache of innovation ready to explode.
Dave: Don't they still work work for bay area companies and just work remotely?
Andy: That's not the point. Programmers are the key to renewed economic development.
client4 over 9 years agoStartup Dinner
4 contractors working evenings
$1800
Pizza for 4 full time engineers
$15
"Yes, you can -definitely- expense dinner."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoHackathon
A team of sweaty engineers in a cramped coworking space building a product that will never see the light of day. Business and marketing types can assist this effort by bringing caffeinated drinks. Brought to you by Amazon.
At the end, the most vaguely marketable product might get investor attention. If so, it will use AWS forever.
Engineer (excitedly): "I'm going to a hackathon this weekend!" Engineer (exhaustedly): "I went to a hackathon this weekend."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years ago10x Engineer
A developer who incurs technical debt so fast he appears more productive than the ten developers tasked with cleaning his mess up.
Founder: "We are only looking for 10x Engineers."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoDoors of a billionaire
Refers to a car belonging to a member of the three comma club with the doors that go up and down instead of side to side.
Russ: Do you wanna know what I have?!
Russ: A fu**ing car whose doors open like this.
Russ: Not like this like this!
svhunt over 9 years agoNet 30
I hope this fly-by-night startup pays me before my rent check is due.
Founder: "And how fast do I need to pay you?"
Freelancer crosses fingers for luck.
Freelancer: "Oh, it's Net 30."
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoCRUD App
An app that can create, read, update, and destroy information.
The proverbial hammer, and every single one of your brilliant startup ideas is a nail.
You are looking at a CRUD app right now.
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoNoncompete Agreement
Any agreement by which:
- The employee pretends they won't go work for the competition.
- The employer pretends it's enforceable in the State of California.
Engineer #1: "They wanted me to sign a noncompete."
Engineers: "AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoMVP
The "minimum viable product" is exactly like the product you had in mind, except with fewer features and more bugs.
Founder: "We're going to validate the market with our MVP."
Engineer: "Sweet!"
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years agoand not scalable
Enterprise
Adj. -- a synonym for "takes longer, but for way more money"
Sales: "The enterprise sales cycle takes months, but we're talking about whales here."
Manager: "All right, we've IPO'd now. It's time to adhere to enterprise process standards."
Engineer: "The enterprise module is going to be a huge effort, but if you're sure it'll be worth it..."
Sales & Engineering: "Does that mean we get raises?"
employeeNumbaOne over 9 years ago
@orien No what are you talking about