DO a startup
Something wantrepenurs or new silicon valley enthusiasts say in trying to convey "working on a startup" or "starting a business."
Ryan: I graduated from business school. Lets DO a startup guys. Menlo: Get the fuck out of here. Startups aren't something you DO.
GoogleEngineer over 8 years agoMonetization
Modifying a free site or service to make money, usually after building a user base.
"Hey, our users love the cat pictures. Now that we have them hooked, let's talk monetization."
"Great, how about we insert a bunch of annoying pop-up video ads?"
healthdatatom almost 9 years agoFirestarters
Strategists and writers at online media who purposely write one side of an incredibly controversial subject to garner massive love from one side and hatred for another. This is done with the intention of getting shares.
My job writing for the New York Times opinion column prepared me perfectly for my new job as a firestarter at the Huffington Post. I just pick the most controversial stories of the past week and month and write for one side. From there you just watch the shares number increase and ignore the comments because flame wars are always the same.
GoogleEngineer over 8 years agoCockchain
A gathering of blockchain enthusiasts talking about how blockchain technology will change the world -- a blockchain circlejerk.
Kevin, John, and Max formed a cockchain as they discussed the viability of smart contracts for prostitutes at the hackathon.
sv_god over 6 years agoYou must be a nocoiner
Three Commas Club
The three comma club is an all exclusive club limited to those whose net worth is valued at a billion dollars or more. The three commas are meant to symbolize the three commas that are present within the billion integer: 1,000,000,000.
My uncle started destroying half of his house out of anger upon finding he was now only worth 980,000,000 dollars and was no longer a member of the Three Comma club.
yungsnuggie over 8 years agoDesign Hackers
This is a term created out of desperation to make graphic designers, animators, or product desginers seem more tech company friendly.
James: What's your sister do? Marlin: Oh she's a design hacker. James: So...like a designer? Marlin: Yeah but nah.
yungsnuggie over 8 years agoSweat Equity
The equity you put in for your hard work. When an investor uses this term, it's normally a red flag and it becomes obvious that they are probably not a professional investor.
I'm takkkin' 45% percent of your comapany cuz I invested 10k into your app. You divide the other 55% amoung your founders as sweat equity.
yungsnuggie over 8 years agoElevator Pitch
An investor pitch that literally spans the time of a single elevator ride. People use this expression as a systematic way of telling founders to shut the fuck up and get to the point.
Ron spent 10 months preparing his 10 second elevator pitch. He did everything he could to get it right.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoTwitter Ghosting
Taking the identity of a friend or somewhat famous person and creating a fan Twitter account of them.
I twitter ghosted as my friend Lewis for years just writing things he'd say to me during class. My troll account of him has more follows than my own.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoFounder Sympathy Blogging
When a semi-high profile startup founder writes an incredibly emotional (and overly dramatic) piece about how hard their lives were to humanize them and make them seem accessible.
My friend Jerry Lee Kai was founder sympathy blogging the other day and to his surprise it got incredibly popular. He had to follow up that later that he wasn't as damaged as the article made him out to be.
yungsnuggie over 8 years agoSticker Whore
Someone who sticks dozens of corporate and code related stickers on their computer to show the world how much of a techie they are.
In his Gender and Womens Studies class, Ryan the sticker whore, pulled out his computer with clearly visible html 5, Node Js, MongDB, Facebook, octocat, and reddit stickers to impress his classmates.
yungsnuggie almost 8 years agoI see this so often
Investor Ambushing
Camping out in front of the exit of a speaking event or the office of an investment firm to get minimal face time with them to either pitch or set up a meeting.
Leo is shameless. He investor ambushes in Palo Alto on Tuesdays and Thursdays trying to pitch his women only dating app.
HalfLife3 over 8 years agoIntrapreneur
A product manager within a company who promotes innovative product development and marketing. He or she tends to question whether they could do everything they are doing now independent of the company they are working for, but are often too afraid to work on anything outside the confines of the company.
Jared was a leading intrapaneur at Hooli for 10 years building designing innovative features that made the company millions of dollars. He was always happy with his safe salary and never tried to do anything on his own.
yungsnuggie almost 9 years agoRIGBY
"Richard is great, but y'know"
Basically a technique of abbreviating the positive preface to a conversation to get to the point.
RIGBY he's an arrogant prick.
RIGBY he sweats profusely and makes a terrible CEO
yungsnuggie almost 8 years agoGoogle Fanboy
Someone who exclusively buys Google products and defends the company even in the most morally questionable circumstances.
Jack: Talking to Lewis really made me feel like my iPhone 6 was a bad purchase. I also am hesitant about buying a Macbook Pro. Jane: Don't listen to that guy, he's a Google fanboy who thinks Apple products are chrome instruments invented by the devil.
GoogleEngineer almost 9 years agoRoko's Basilisk
Super AI of future which will torture the avatars of those who did not help its existence.
And this ultimate Kickstarter campaign https://twitter.com/charlesjo/status/579736882960986113 ht @webhat
The ultimate @kickstarter campaign! Donate to Singularity or else face consequences :)
@psygnisfive
charlesjo almost 9 years agoGotta Catch Em' All Investing
When an investor aims to diversify his or her portfolio by investing in one company in every popular area of technology.
"Gotta Catch Em' All" is phrase from the game series Pokemon, where players are encouraged to catch every type of Pokemon (translated to Pocket Monsters).
Jack: Why is Max investing in a Bitcoin distribution company. That's so unlike him. Annie: He''s trying to move toward a Gotta Catch Em All style portfolio to diversify. Jack: Why..
yungsnuggie almost 9 years agoLawyer
Bloodsucking parasites which benefit by deriving nutrients at the host's expense.
Founder 1: So what can you do for our company?
Lawyer: Well I can help you incorporate.
Founder 2: Just did that on legal zoom for $250
Lawyer: I, I can help you negotiate term sheets
Founder 2: Just googled everything we need to know about convertible debt
Lawyer: uhh, uhh, I can do other stuff too! Here, look, my finger's not really cut off! See!
Founder 1: Haha, that's nifty. Okay, we'll keep your card
Lawyer: *Desperately* Thank you!
Founder 1: *Flushes card down toilet after meeting*
willgr81 almost 8 years agolol
Can't tell if you are joking or not