D2F ratio
D2F ratio or "dick to floor" ratio is used to determine the relationship between two or more men and the distance between their penises and the floor. Often used to calculate the most efficient way to jerk off men at TechCrunch Disrupt events.
Guy 1: How do we jerk off 4 men at the same time and dick swap them to maximize jerking?
Guy 2: Well we'd have to figure out the D2F ratio and group men based on that.
Original Jared over 8 years agoHackathon
A team of sweaty engineers in a cramped coworking space building a product that will never see the light of day. Business and marketing types can assist this effort by bringing caffeinated drinks. Brought to you by Amazon.
At the end, the most vaguely marketable product might get investor attention. If so, it will use AWS forever.
Engineer (excitedly): "I'm going to a hackathon this weekend!" Engineer (exhaustedly): "I went to a hackathon this weekend."
employeeNumbaOne almost 9 years agoDogecoin
A now mostly defunct crypto currency that has a picture of a Shiba Inu dog as it's logo.
Delivery guy: Hi I have your pizza delivery, that will be 22.45$ Randolph: Fantastic. Do you accept Dogecoin? Delivery guy: Why yes we do. That will be 130,644.70 Doge.
yungsnuggie almost 9 years agoWeb Developer / Programmer
The distinction between a web developer/programmer and software engineer is that a software engineer generally has a theoretical CS education and is knowledgable in the areas of algorithms, data structures and architecture whereas a web developer/programmer simply knows how to program. At this point the line is pretty blurry but some engineers like the distinction so they can feel better about themselves.
Tim: Look at that idiot over there. He doesn't know anything about algorithms and he didn't even go to college.
David: Sure but isn't what he does day to day exactly what you do.
Tim: Yes but I went to MIT
zazpowered almost 9 years agoBAD
Broken As Designed: A product fails to perform as expected, because the company making it intentionally did it that way (either from misunderstanding, or on purpose)
Windows 95's auto-redial being limited to 100 redials.
iamDeveloper almost 9 years agoThe Founder Industrial Complex
Describes the institution of increasing the number of founders (and new companies) in a given area to increase spending on early stage services that venture capitalists already fund.
In order to take advantage of this founder industrial complex, we're using our VC money to create a web-tool that instantly sets up a splash page for 10$ a month to capitalize on the increase of incorporated startups in this area.
yungsnuggie almost 9 years agoLifestyle Business
A lifestyle business is a business that is set up and run by its founders primarily with the aim of sustaining a particular level of income and no more; or to provide a foundation from which to enjoy a particular lifestyle.
i.e. Not "Crushing It"
Mike: They had so many paying customers that they were able to become a lifestyle business!
Jon: I'm so sorry to hear that.
mike almost 9 years agoAugmented Reality
If you've never seen an augmented reality app before augmented reality is sort of like having helpful pop ups follow you in real life that are marketed to have a stronger use case than simply looking something up on your phone. They are normally seen through a headset or camera lens.
Google glass has made me incredibly disenchanted with augmented reality apps after having used the device for a long period of time. Every strong social use case out there seems to be a gross violation of privacy.
GoogleEngineer over 8 years agoAPI
Software that lets applications interact with other applications that you don't own.
Whenever Pinterest prompts users to use Facebook login, you're using a Facebook API
GoogleEngineer almost 9 years ago
Liquidity Event
Founders start off owning the entire company.
Then they convince VCs to buy some of it, and they use that money to pay themselves salaries.
Then the VCs convince either retail investors or a megacorporation to buy the company, and that's a liquidity event.
This sounds like a pyramid scheme, but trust me, it isn't.
Employees can't do anything with their stock options until a liquidity event.
employeeNumbaOne almost 9 years agoJack Effect
The effect Jack Dorsey's induction as CEO of Twitter has had on founders who now operate more than one startup.
The Jack Effect has caused most entrepreneurs at Stanford to operate more than one company at once.
yungsnuggie over 8 years agoEngineer Jailbait
Someone who has been coding since a very early age and is employed at a large company or startup. They are younger than 18, but seem much older given the vast depth of their knowledge.
Julie: That guy Kumar is kind of cute.
George: Woah, I'd stay away from him if I was you, he's 17 and engineer jailbait.
Julie: Good thing you told me. I dodged a serious bullet, but man he's such a tease.
yungsnuggie almost 9 years agoHumorification
Like gamification except you add elements of humor to your product to make it more interesting and engaging.
Tim: What does Agile mean? I hate reading dictionaries I feel like I'm back in college.
Chris: http://svdictionary.com/words/agile
Tim: Wow that's amazing. I'm going to visit this site everyday
zazpowered almost 9 years agoThe Undernet
The part of the internet you can't access because you aren't a criminal or are looking for things beyond the scope of amazon.com.
I heard James spent an entire week trying to sell fake Dragon eggs to Russian buyers on the undernet, advertising that it was the key to taking over Europe.
yungsnuggie almost 9 years agoAcquihire
When a startup is bought with the sole purpose of hiring the startup's employees versus obtaining the product/users. Generally, startups that get acquhired are struggling and the move is done as a last resort.
Alex: I heard your startup got acquired by Facebook. Give me some of that startup money.
John: It was an acquihire. I don't want to talk about it.
zazpowered almost 9 years agoManagerial Reach-Around
This is when a startup manager/CEO/founder sits over your shoulder, watching you code/design and providing unhelpful input. In the most extreme cases, they are physically touching your keyboard, mouse, and/or screen.
I've been trying to get work done all day, but the CEO is such a shitty manager that he keeps giving me a managerial reach-around. Why can't someone teach him to delegate?!
jpdavy almost 9 years agoRe-Engineering Alchemist
A practitioner of sophisticated techniques to help one overcome deeply rooted personal limitations leading to a golden transformation.
Victor Escalante is an International Personal and Corporate Consultant who has helped thousands of individuals overcome deeply rooted personal limitations. His acumen for personal change has earned him the title, The Re-Engineering Alchemist.
tallenhanes over 8 years agoZen
A common company name prefix and word bastardized by Silicon Valley startups, usually chosen to give new users a false sense of comfort for their soulless product.
I love using ZenPayRoll And ZenBox. I just feel so at peace when using their product.
GoogleEngineer almost 9 years agoBusiness Hour
When you go to a happy hour with the only intention to network with people that might invest in you or promote your startup.
Rachel: That dude has been talking to Ryan Hoover this whole time. I know a Product Hunt feature is nice but I thought this was a happy hour not a business hour.
zazpowered almost 9 years ago